I loved episode 23. I always love back story episodes though.
Applejack: really just loves her home and the country.
Rarity: learned her talent for finding gems, which was a nice tie in and throw back to "a dog and pony show".
Fluttershy: I believe she is scared of heights which is why she doesn't fly too much.
Rainbow Dash: well no real development there, but thats ok.
Pinkie Pie: Easily my favorite bit. It shows her tragic past where she never knew happyness, oddly enough that reinforces what I was writing for her in my fanfic, though mines a bit more grimdark.
Twilight: She lost control of her magic, but is powerful, weakest back story save RD.
Quote from mrfatcat »
"That's strange, the clock said it was 3 when I got up from my nap. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened for me, though, as I've misread the clock due to my wall-eyes before."
The rest was rather good, I liked it, but this line. This line bothers me, The rest is fluid natural, but this line feels forced, it disrupts the flow. Also wall-eyed is used a bit to much, but I have the same problem about sticking to one phrase. I like it would like to read more.
Even if I dont like the idea of the Dalek being in the very first bit, they are the most dangerous thing. But there are scarier things, Angels, that thing where the doctor was on the monorail and it read his mind slowly getting more and more ahead of him until it was the doctor copying it. Those are horrific if done right. "The angels have the box."
In retrospect, I agree on the fact that the clock line feels like it disrupts the flow. It seems like the viewpoints change. But I really don't know how I could change it to fit better.
Also, I really had trouble decided what alien to pick as well. I didn't want to use Weeping Pegasi, as that would be better suited for a later chapter. Maybe I'll make the Dalek not be a Dalek at all, but something different? Somehow. It's the Doctor, sometimes things just don't make any sense.
The funny thing is, I never knew you could farm rocks...
And why farm rocks, anyways? Gems can be found easily in the wild. Unless...
ROCKS ARE MORE EXPENSIVE THEN GEMS?!
Equestria:Where ponies can talk, declared as vegetarians yet discuss eating hot-dogs, rocks are rarer then gems, dogs talk like a character from a book series that doesn't exist in this universe, and there are time lords in a universe that doesn't have them.
TIME LORDS WITH WALL-EYED COMPANIONS
And that brings me to my next point, a Doctor Whooves fan-fic. Which is my first public fan-fic I've ever written. I'm writing it here on the spot, and it will likely be improved on.
Ditzy 'Derpy' Doo was never a normal pony. An accident that occurred when she was just a filly gave her wall-eyes, which for a pegasus, is a problem. On multiple occasions she has caused problems for other ponies, and on one occasion, a huge benefit for ponies everywhere.
It all started in the middle of summer, when after an unfortunate incident where Derpy bumped into a delivery pony's truck and caused furniture to fall out onto some poor pony below, she was grounded by the Mayor of Ponyville from flying. Not that she cared too much about not flying, as walking was less dangerous to her with her wall-eyes. It's been a week since she did that, and even though she has seen the pony she accidentally hurt around town, thankfully she didn't recognize her any of the times she encountered her.
Derpy was walking down the main street of town that fateful day, wondering what she would do. Her only friend Lyra was out of town that day, so Derpy was by herself that day. She mainly wondered around town, looking at the various items that were in stock at the market, before heading over to the Sugar Cube Corner.
Pinkie Pie was her usual upbeat self, working happily in the kitchen making cupcakes. She noticed Derpy walking into the shop.
"Ain't it an absolutely-positively-wonderful-spectacular day, Ditzy Doo?" Said Pinkie, who was putting cupcakes into the oven.
"Pinkie, you really need to stop borrowing phrases from the Apple clan. It really isn't good for you." Derpy replied.
"I really don't CARE about my grammar, as long as my cupcakes taste SPECTACULAR! Mr. and Mrs. Cake are giving me good pay for this job, which allows me to buy all SORTS of crazy ingredients to put in my cupcakes!"
"I really don't care what kind of ingredients you use in your cupcakes. Can I have a dozen?" Derpy was getting impatient at Pinkie Pie, who was starting to make her angry.
"Okey-dokey! Coming right up!"
Pinkie Pie gave Derpy a bag of a dozen cupcakes, fresh from the oven.
"Thanks Pinkie, you're the best." Derpy said.
Derpy turned around from the counter and walked out the door. Or at least, she almost did. She immediately banged into the wall, missing the door by a foot, and leaving her with a small lump on her forehead.
"Ow, stupid wall-eyes" Derpy muttered under her breath. Walking out the door without bumping into anything this time, she noticed that the sun was setting.
"That's strange, the clock said it was 3 when I got up from my nap. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened for me, though, as I've misread the clock due to my wall-eyes before."
Walking down main-street the usual way she went home, which was through the market that was now closed due to it being sun-down.
Suddenly, a loud crashing noise came from the alley to her right. This was strange, as nopony was there, until
a brown pony came charging through, with a curious cutie mark the shape of an hourglass. He had brown fur, and a darker brown mane.
"RUN!" He yelled, with an accent that sounded like he came from Trottingham.
Derpy didn't know what was going on for a brief moment, which ended quite suddenly something that looked like an upside-down ice-cream cone with studs all over it, a rounded top, and a few sticks that had appendages on the end.
"EXTERMINATE THE DOCTOR!" It said, shortly before a blue beam fired from one of the sticks and half-destroyed a cart left out by it's owner.
"WHAT IN BLAZES IS GOING ON OUT THERE?!" Said a unicorn who popped her head out from a window, who had her mane combed, shortly before screaming after seeing the creature, and quickly shut the window and shutters with her magic.
"CATCH THIS!" Yelled the brown pony, suddenly throwing a blue ball at Derpy.
Dear God,
Thank you for this lovely life and all, but don't you think everything would be a bit better if we were all ponies? Start the whole world over again and make it start with magical talking ponies, unicorns, and pegasi. Also, make clouds stop moving on their own, and make it so the pegasus ponies do all the work!
Your faithful student, Twi- Oh wait, I mean, a person - Club559
This.
Mod edit: User was warned for this post. Please refrain from making one-word replies that don't contribute to the topic at hand :3
...im a guy, saw a ton of people with my little pony avatars, saw a link to this thread in someone's sig, though "WTF IS WITH THESE PEOPLE IN MY LITTLE PONY THEY SOOOO GAAAAAY!!!!!".... looked at the Q&A thing, and now I'm heading to youtube to watch the first episode..... i don't know what I'll be afterwards but we'll see...
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Life, say goodbye. When this releases, I'm committing suicide by not sleeping.
...but maybe I shouldn't, don't want to give gamers a bad image here. I mean, look at Korea!
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In retrospect, I agree on the fact that the clock line feels like it disrupts the flow. It seems like the viewpoints change. But I really don't know how I could change it to fit better.
Also, I really had trouble decided what alien to pick as well. I didn't want to use Weeping Pegasi, as that would be better suited for a later chapter. Maybe I'll make the Dalek not be a Dalek at all, but something different? Somehow. It's the Doctor, sometimes things just don't make any sense.
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And why farm rocks, anyways? Gems can be found easily in the wild. Unless...
ROCKS ARE MORE EXPENSIVE THEN GEMS?!
Equestria:Where ponies can talk, declared as vegetarians yet discuss eating hot-dogs, rocks are rarer then gems, dogs talk like a character from a book series that doesn't exist in this universe, and there are time lords in a universe that doesn't have them.
TIME LORDS WITH WALL-EYED COMPANIONS
And that brings me to my next point, a Doctor Whooves fan-fic. Which is my first public fan-fic I've ever written. I'm writing it here on the spot, and it will likely be improved on.
======================================================
Ditzy 'Derpy' Doo was never a normal pony. An accident that occurred when she was just a filly gave her wall-eyes, which for a pegasus, is a problem. On multiple occasions she has caused problems for other ponies, and on one occasion, a huge benefit for ponies everywhere.
It all started in the middle of summer, when after an unfortunate incident where Derpy bumped into a delivery pony's truck and caused furniture to fall out onto some poor pony below, she was grounded by the Mayor of Ponyville from flying. Not that she cared too much about not flying, as walking was less dangerous to her with her wall-eyes. It's been a week since she did that, and even though she has seen the pony she accidentally hurt around town, thankfully she didn't recognize her any of the times she encountered her.
Derpy was walking down the main street of town that fateful day, wondering what she would do. Her only friend Lyra was out of town that day, so Derpy was by herself that day. She mainly wondered around town, looking at the various items that were in stock at the market, before heading over to the Sugar Cube Corner.
Pinkie Pie was her usual upbeat self, working happily in the kitchen making cupcakes. She noticed Derpy walking into the shop.
"Ain't it an absolutely-positively-wonderful-spectacular day, Ditzy Doo?" Said Pinkie, who was putting cupcakes into the oven.
"Pinkie, you really need to stop borrowing phrases from the Apple clan. It really isn't good for you." Derpy replied.
"I really don't CARE about my grammar, as long as my cupcakes taste SPECTACULAR! Mr. and Mrs. Cake are giving me good pay for this job, which allows me to buy all SORTS of crazy ingredients to put in my cupcakes!"
"I really don't care what kind of ingredients you use in your cupcakes. Can I have a dozen?" Derpy was getting impatient at Pinkie Pie, who was starting to make her angry.
"Okey-dokey! Coming right up!"
Pinkie Pie gave Derpy a bag of a dozen cupcakes, fresh from the oven.
"Thanks Pinkie, you're the best." Derpy said.
Derpy turned around from the counter and walked out the door. Or at least, she almost did. She immediately banged into the wall, missing the door by a foot, and leaving her with a small lump on her forehead.
"Ow, stupid wall-eyes" Derpy muttered under her breath. Walking out the door without bumping into anything this time, she noticed that the sun was setting.
"That's strange, the clock said it was 3 when I got up from my nap. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened for me, though, as I've misread the clock due to my wall-eyes before."
Walking down main-street the usual way she went home, which was through the market that was now closed due to it being sun-down.
Suddenly, a loud crashing noise came from the alley to her right. This was strange, as nopony was there, until
a brown pony came charging through, with a curious cutie mark the shape of an hourglass. He had brown fur, and a darker brown mane.
"RUN!" He yelled, with an accent that sounded like he came from Trottingham.
Derpy didn't know what was going on for a brief moment, which ended quite suddenly something that looked like an upside-down ice-cream cone with studs all over it, a rounded top, and a few sticks that had appendages on the end.
"EXTERMINATE THE DOCTOR!" It said, shortly before a blue beam fired from one of the sticks and half-destroyed a cart left out by it's owner.
"WHAT IN BLAZES IS GOING ON OUT THERE?!" Said a unicorn who popped her head out from a window, who had her mane combed, shortly before screaming after seeing the creature, and quickly shut the window and shutters with her magic.
"CATCH THIS!" Yelled the brown pony, suddenly throwing a blue ball at Derpy.
End of Prologue
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Somebody review this.
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This.
Mod edit: User was warned for this post. Please refrain from making one-word replies that don't contribute to the topic at hand :3
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They drive me to escapism.
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...and I can't believe it.
I'm trying to lucid dream just to be a pony. WHY?!
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Like this:
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Don't worry, you'll be a pony soon.
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Pinky Pie has breasts.
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I heard it was about Fluttershy from somebody on the Pony Brigade TF2 server, but I'm not sure.
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...my gosh what am I doing?!
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It opens the door for pony games. Hasbro should hire that person, now.
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Somehow, that pony reminds me of Maple Story.
Vote for the 1st option, because more Fluttershy is great.