I found a stronghold in some regions and I found a specific destination to make a room as my house. I turned library into my house. I furbish it into "clean" (No cracked/ Mossy) room. Also, I store my inventory into the chest, then I add an exit to outside so I will hunt animals for food, I add villagers in the stronghold I found. Next, I seized the stronghold as my whole property. I furbished the whole stronghold into clean. I add lights so that the zombies and other aggressive mobs will not spawn because of the sake of protection. Mostly, I keep on adding new rooms and corridors so that everywhere will be more usual than before.
Eh... I'm sorry but it's not very good. Not sure if English is your first language but the grammar is painful. You don't seem to be able to make up your mind as to what tense it's in. It feels less like a fanfic and more like a description of your single-player world which really takes you out of it. Most of all, nothing happens in it. There's no story beyond "I found a stronghold and now I live there". It's painfully short.
The thing is, people seem to assume that if they make their story too long it will lose people's attention. NO! This is a completely incorrect assumption. People actually respect you more for doing so even if it's not that good. The short length and complaints about making it too long by certain writers (PD) is one of many reasons why I despise their work. It implies laziness to any of us who have read even a half-decent fanfic. Another misconception is, "I must keep this strictly bound to the rules of the game otherwise it's not a minefic". ALSO NO! Reimagine the game-world and its community as much as you wish. Work in the innumerable mods. Say screw you to the game's system and just have Entity 303 (beware the 16th August) in it! If you want to see how to do that, or even a template to copy-paste here's people to look at that I immediately think off: Gravity_Bound; Mister_Blak; 1Dani; Asentagross; Nomolos1; Immortus; ApostleTrivius (through the minefic list); even myself! Hell, I'm a pretty good example of how to copy a template and build up from it as everything I did is based everything I did on ApostleTrivius, down to the timeline. Also, descriptions shouldn't just be mundane lists of items. Tell us what the items look like, how they feel, how they smell, where they are in the positioning of the world. Play around with the phrasing. Read some Dickens or Paradise Lost or something older than 20 years old. Heck, read the Belgariad! Also, don't be afraid to ignore the idea of cubes, if anything it gives the world more of an authentic feel.
Overall, I'll give it a 5/10 as it's your very first attempt. Sorry to go supercritical there.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Like fantasy? Like Minecraft? Check out a blend of the two here! Fall and a Rise: A Vanillacraft Tale!
Eh... I'm sorry but it's not very good. Not sure if English is your first language but the grammar is painful. You don't seem to be able to make up your mind as to what tense it's in. It feels less like a fanfic and more like a description of your single-player world which really takes you out of it. Most of all, nothing happens in it. There's no story beyond "I found a stronghold and now I live there". It's painfully short.
The thing is, people seem to assume that if they make their story too long it will lose people's attention. NO! This is a completely incorrect assumption. People actually respect you more for doing so even if it's not that good. The short length and complaints about making it too long by certain writers (PD) is one of many reasons why I despise their work. It implies laziness to any of us who have read even a half-decent fanfic. Another misconception is, "I must keep this strictly bound to the rules of the game otherwise it's not a minefic". ALSO NO! Reimagine the game-world and its community as much as you wish. Work in the innumerable mods. Say screw you to the game's system and just have Entity 303 (beware the 16th August) in it! If you want to see how to do that, or even a template to copy-paste here's people to look at that I immediately think off: Gravity_Bound; Mister_Blak; 1Dani; Asentagross; Nomolos1; Immortus; ApostleTrivius (through the minefic list); even myself! Hell, I'm a pretty good example of how to copy a template and build up from it as everything I did is based everything I did on ApostleTrivius, down to the timeline. Also, descriptions shouldn't just be mundane lists of items. Tell us what the items look like, how they feel, how they smell, where they are in the positioning of the world. Play around with the phrasing. Read some Dickens or Paradise Lost or something older than 20 years old. Heck, read the Belgariad! Also, don't be afraid to ignore the idea of cubes, if anything it gives the world more of an authentic feel.
Overall, I'll give it a 5/10 as it's your very first attempt. Sorry to go supercritical there.
How is that story?
I added furnitures, glowstones as lights, and any thing I want. I add new corridors and new rooms. I added a stash of tool and armor inventory.
The thing is, people seem to assume that if they make their story too long it will lose people's attention. NO! This is a completely incorrect assumption. People actually respect you more for doing so even if it's not that good. The short length and complaints about making it too long by certain writers (PD) is one of many reasons why I despise their work. It implies laziness to any of us who have read even a half-decent fanfic. Another misconception is, "I must keep this strictly bound to the rules of the game otherwise it's not a minefic". ALSO NO! Reimagine the game-world and its community as much as you wish. Work in the innumerable mods. Say screw you to the game's system and just have Entity 303 (beware the 16th August) in it! If you want to see how to do that, or even a template to copy-paste here's people to look at that I immediately think off: Gravity_Bound; Mister_Blak; 1Dani; Asentagross; Nomolos1; Immortus; ApostleTrivius (through the minefic list); even myself! Hell, I'm a pretty good example of how to copy a template and build up from it as everything I did is based everything I did on ApostleTrivius, down to the timeline. Also, descriptions shouldn't just be mundane lists of items. Tell us what the items look like, how they feel, how they smell, where they are in the positioning of the world. Play around with the phrasing. Read some Dickens or Paradise Lost or something older than 20 years old. Heck, read the Belgariad! Also, don't be afraid to ignore the idea of cubes, if anything it gives the world more of an authentic feel.
Overall, I'll give it a 5/10 as it's your very first attempt. Sorry to go supercritical there.
Like fantasy? Like Minecraft? Check out a blend of the two here! Fall and a Rise: A Vanillacraft Tale!
I learn English perfectly.
Under absolutely no circumstances have you learned English perfectly.
How did you know that?
I dunno, your posts, most of which neither make any semblance of sense or have incredibly broken English?
Why is it blunt?
To be blunt... "To keep it simple", "To lack great detail"?
In fact...
Like fantasy? Like Minecraft? Check out a blend of the two here! Fall and a Rise: A Vanillacraft Tale!