I was in my brick house when I saw a player near the house, building his own house in a forest. I walked to him, and I saw that was like me but with a red shirt. I said to him:- Hello, my name is Steve, what's your name?- My name is Red Steve.I was a very good friend of him, but one day, he was killed by a creeper, and appeared a player with white eyes, it was Red Steve! But with white eyes! I runned a lot of time, while Red Steve was chasing me. Then he said:- Wait, Steve, it was just a joke!I looked at the calendar, and it was April Fool's.
Hmmm... "The Second Steve", a basic story; not an in-depth plot.
Where is Steve's brick house? What does Steve look like? What is Red Steve building his house with?
There are some parts of your content that need to be defined clearly.
"I was a very good friend of him, but one day...", a sudden transition of event in a sentence can easily confuse a person or cause a twist of mind.
When a dialogue or quote appears, you shouldn't use a hyphen before a text, instead, you should use quotation marks wrapped around a speech or dialogue; "Hello, my name is Steve. What's your name?" I said.
So you should work on adding more details to your text, perhaps adjectives could be useful to describe Red Steve's shirt. Give a good reason why it's red, so the reader knows what the shirt represents.
I am Piccolo, the strongest Namekian!
Where is Steve's brick house? What does Steve look like? What is Red Steve building his house with?
There are some parts of your content that need to be defined clearly.
"I was a very good friend of him, but one day...", a sudden transition of event in a sentence can easily confuse a person or cause a twist of mind.
When a dialogue or quote appears, you shouldn't use a hyphen before a text, instead, you should use quotation marks wrapped around a speech or dialogue; "Hello, my name is Steve. What's your name?" I said.
So you should work on adding more details to your text, perhaps adjectives could be useful to describe Red Steve's shirt. Give a good reason why it's red, so the reader knows what the shirt represents.
The plot actually seems to be nonexistant.
The word count is 118 words...
If you stretched it out a bit, and added a bit of description or anything it would be better.