Yo!
I've finished on my second short story. This time, with 1200 words! Whoop! Whoop!
But to be honest, I've looked over my story and it just somewhat doesn't seem to shine as bright as my first fanfic.
Anyhow, I've did it to do it again!
Thanks to whoever's reading! I hope you enjoy! Does Once read my work at all? ._.
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The deafening thunder crackles across the darkened sky as the heavy raindrops befell upon the world of Minecraft. The gales blow strongly across the taiga, moving trees as the gales past. The heavy raindrops beat against the large spruce trees. And on a woman that was on her knees. facing a spider in front of her, and the spider wasn’t breathing.
Under the devastating thunderstorm that rocks the forest, a woman looks at the spider that lay on the grass contaminated by the torrential rains. The dirt became wet mud under the victim of the rain. The woman has crimson red hair that grew to her waist but she has a pair of eyes that held no life. Tears are streaming down her cheek as she stares down at the cold lifeless body of the spider. She sobbed lightly as she placed her hand on the spider’s dead body. She moved her hand across the body, feeling the skin of the spider. The rain grew heavier by the minute, raindrops beat against the woman’s body. But she never cared. She laid down next to the spider, resting her head on the spider’s body, hoping to listen to the faint heartbeat of the creature. But that is absurd, the creature is dead. Nothing else.
“It’s all... my fault…”
The woman and the spider had an interesting relationship. Both of them had little time on their hands but the bonds between them were like steel. The woman had a task to do hunting for food for the village or eradicating the monsters nearby the village. Although they had an iron golem to do the work, it’s expensive to feed iron golems the iron ingots every day for it to work.
The spider on the other hand, had its own job. The spider had a somewhat similar job like the woman, to find food in the surrounding areas. Usually for spiders, they would take shifts but the recent hunting of the nearby village has placed the spider clan at risk. The clan moved further away, with lesser spiders to hunt for food.
But no matter the consequences, the two always seemed to find one another. Under every night of the full moon, the two would meet at their usual spot, under a great spruce tree on top of a great cliff. The two seemed to enjoy the beautiful natural scenery of the place. This would be the only time where both of them have the free time to enjoy doing anything they could possibly do. They pretended it was like daytime, because it is in the spider’s perspective, and enjoyed the time like any usual day. It was always like this, and it felt like it could last forever.
But as we all know, time rots everything.
Even hope.
The village found out the woman was sneaking out and they then forbid her from coming out. On some full moons, the spider would meet at the spot and play with the woman. But sometimes, things just wouldn’t work so well and the woman never presented herself at that full moon. But the spider would wait. It would wait no matter what.
Eventually, as time passes, the woman began to show herself lesser. Days of full moon turned to weeks. To months. To years. But the spider will wait. It believed the woman would someday, be freed once again. But what a tragedy indeed, for the woman was seen sneaking out the village still. Watched carefully under the supervision of a guard, the woman is unable to sneak out the village anymore. Until a year later, she could wait no more, with fear the spider would leave her, she killed the guard when they were both alone hunting, which of course, happened to be under a full moon.
Blood stained her hands and her chest where the blood was spilled. The arrow she used to stab the guard’s neck was dripping red liquid to the floor. The guard lies on the ground, suffering a slow death as blood spilled out from the wound like a river. The woman’s eyes widen in horror. She cupped her mouth with both of her hands to prevent herself from screaming. Thoughts flashed before her of what would happen to her if she went back. Worries and anxiety began to fill up her soul rapidly. She put down her hands and resumes breathing, a new thought struck her. She never needed to go home.
The full moon is still high in the sky, showering the lands in a faint glow of light. The woman kept running, her breathing struggling to keep up pace with her running. She sprinted across frozen lakes, hopped across small hills, her mind constantly in thought of the spider friend she had. 3 years ago.
She got to the top of the cliff, collapsing to the floor to catch her breathe. She lifted her head, a big smile on her face. But the spider is not there.
Her mouth twisted into a horrible frown as her heart broke to millions of pieces. She got up, still panting , and glanced around to find her friend. But she saw only natural spawning creatures but nothing that resembles her spider friend. She felt sadness overwhelming her heart as she raced down the cliff to find the spider. She was sure that their bond between each other was very strong. It couldn't have break just yet. Did it?
The rocks gave way below her and she tripped and fell down the mountain, rolling. The world went spinning in her eyes and pain surged through her bodies as she crash onto the hard rocks of the mountainside. She made impact against the floor, slamming down her body hard. She could hear some of her bones fracturing from the whole fall. Her fingers hurt when they are bent but appear normal and would heal in a short time.
She struggled to stand up, her legs shaking violently beneath her weight. Ignoring the slight pain that emanated from her feet, she began walking in a slow and painful manner. She placed her arms over her stomach to hold back the pain that never seemed to stop. Her vision grows blurry but in the distance, she could see a somewhat familiar figure.
The clouds darken and rain follows almost immediately. The woman continued walking, narrowing her eyes to fix her vision. As she got closer, the figure becomes clearer. And right there, she wished she had never been here in the first place.
The loud thunder crackles across the darkened sky as a torrential rain falls upon the world of Minecraft. The gales blew across the taiga strongly, shaking trees as it past. The woman rests her head on the body of the spider, her clothes soaking wet from the thunderstorm. She sobbed loudly as she lay there on the spider’s body. Shot mercilessly by a villager, the spider was dead long before she came. Long before she arrived at the cliff.
She turned her head to face the spider’s back where the arrow is punctured deep beside it. Her eyes that were covered in tears, could make out some sort of poison spilling out a little from the tip. Through pain and tears, she removed the arrow that was embedded on the spider’s back and examined the green liquid. It was a poison of her village.
She glanced to the spider then at the arrow, a thought came before her. She fought back the tears that streamed down her cheek and struggled to find strength in the depression that tainted her. She held the arrow with both hands, the tip facing her chest. She closed her eyes, letting the rain fall over her face. She breathed the last, and stabbed herself with the poisoned arrow.
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Hey! If you liked my stuff! Please leave a comment below on what you think overally on my story! Also vote on my poll! Don't hesitate to click no or provide negative comments, I would be glad to improve myself as I so.
If you want, you can check out my previous, and shorter fan fiction : The Last Walk Thanks much! Loves and smiley faces!
Also, when she fell, from there, I began reading the story with a expression on my face. This really got me. Although it was a sad themed story, and I am still writing this with expression, I really could feel the close connection between the spider and the lady and I really do hate the village for forbidding her to go outside the village. I mean, she wasn't hurting anyone, was she? I really love the spider's dedication to her and how the woman could take no longer and HAD to go see him.
I don't exactly know how I feel about the story, which is good. It really got to me as a reader, this is probably one of the best short fictions I've read here! Great job.
The beginning of the story was great and I could never plot a story in which the enemy is actually a close friend! I kinda got lost in the middle of the story, but all in all, it was great! Do you mind checking out my fan-fic? It's a couple hundred words longer than yours.
Frankly speaking, I don't know.
I suppose maybe I like your work very much, I'm willing you would look at mine?
I don't see a clear reason really. Just felt like it. Planning to make a secret ending by tomorrow or sometime.
I've finished on my second short story. This time, with 1200 words! Whoop! Whoop!
But to be honest, I've looked over my story and it just somewhat doesn't seem to shine as bright as my first fanfic.
Anyhow, I've did it to do it again!
Thanks to whoever's reading! I hope you enjoy!
Does Once read my work at all? ._.
The deafening thunder crackles across the darkened sky as the heavy raindrops befell upon the world of Minecraft. The gales blow strongly across the taiga, moving trees as the gales past. The heavy raindrops beat against the large spruce trees. And on a woman that was on her knees. facing a spider in front of her, and the spider wasn’t breathing.
Under the devastating thunderstorm that rocks the forest, a woman looks at the spider that lay on the grass contaminated by the torrential rains. The dirt became wet mud under the victim of the rain. The woman has crimson red hair that grew to her waist but she has a pair of eyes that held no life. Tears are streaming down her cheek as she stares down at the cold lifeless body of the spider. She sobbed lightly as she placed her hand on the spider’s dead body. She moved her hand across the body, feeling the skin of the spider. The rain grew heavier by the minute, raindrops beat against the woman’s body. But she never cared. She laid down next to the spider, resting her head on the spider’s body, hoping to listen to the faint heartbeat of the creature. But that is absurd, the creature is dead. Nothing else.
The woman and the spider had an interesting relationship. Both of them had little time on their hands but the bonds between them were like steel. The woman had a task to do hunting for food for the village or eradicating the monsters nearby the village. Although they had an iron golem to do the work, it’s expensive to feed iron golems the iron ingots every day for it to work.
The spider on the other hand, had its own job. The spider had a somewhat similar job like the woman, to find food in the surrounding areas. Usually for spiders, they would take shifts but the recent hunting of the nearby village has placed the spider clan at risk. The clan moved further away, with lesser spiders to hunt for food.
But no matter the consequences, the two always seemed to find one another. Under every night of the full moon, the two would meet at their usual spot, under a great spruce tree on top of a great cliff. The two seemed to enjoy the beautiful natural scenery of the place. This would be the only time where both of them have the free time to enjoy doing anything they could possibly do. They pretended it was like daytime, because it is in the spider’s perspective, and enjoyed the time like any usual day. It was always like this, and it felt like it could last forever.
But as we all know, time rots everything.
Even hope.
The village found out the woman was sneaking out and they then forbid her from coming out. On some full moons, the spider would meet at the spot and play with the woman. But sometimes, things just wouldn’t work so well and the woman never presented herself at that full moon. But the spider would wait. It would wait no matter what.
Eventually, as time passes, the woman began to show herself lesser. Days of full moon turned to weeks. To months. To years. But the spider will wait. It believed the woman would someday, be freed once again. But what a tragedy indeed, for the woman was seen sneaking out the village still. Watched carefully under the supervision of a guard, the woman is unable to sneak out the village anymore. Until a year later, she could wait no more, with fear the spider would leave her, she killed the guard when they were both alone hunting, which of course, happened to be under a full moon.
Blood stained her hands and her chest where the blood was spilled. The arrow she used to stab the guard’s neck was dripping red liquid to the floor. The guard lies on the ground, suffering a slow death as blood spilled out from the wound like a river. The woman’s eyes widen in horror. She cupped her mouth with both of her hands to prevent herself from screaming. Thoughts flashed before her of what would happen to her if she went back. Worries and anxiety began to fill up her soul rapidly. She put down her hands and resumes breathing, a new thought struck her. She never needed to go home.
The full moon is still high in the sky, showering the lands in a faint glow of light. The woman kept running, her breathing struggling to keep up pace with her running. She sprinted across frozen lakes, hopped across small hills, her mind constantly in thought of the spider friend she had. 3 years ago.
She got to the top of the cliff, collapsing to the floor to catch her breathe. She lifted her head, a big smile on her face. But the spider is not there.
Her mouth twisted into a horrible frown as her heart broke to millions of pieces. She got up, still panting , and glanced around to find her friend. But she saw only natural spawning creatures but nothing that resembles her spider friend. She felt sadness overwhelming her heart as she raced down the cliff to find the spider. She was sure that their bond between each other was very strong. It couldn't have break just yet. Did it?
The rocks gave way below her and she tripped and fell down the mountain, rolling. The world went spinning in her eyes and pain surged through her bodies as she crash onto the hard rocks of the mountainside. She made impact against the floor, slamming down her body hard. She could hear some of her bones fracturing from the whole fall. Her fingers hurt when they are bent but appear normal and would heal in a short time.
She struggled to stand up, her legs shaking violently beneath her weight. Ignoring the slight pain that emanated from her feet, she began walking in a slow and painful manner. She placed her arms over her stomach to hold back the pain that never seemed to stop. Her vision grows blurry but in the distance, she could see a somewhat familiar figure.
The clouds darken and rain follows almost immediately. The woman continued walking, narrowing her eyes to fix her vision. As she got closer, the figure becomes clearer. And right there, she wished she had never been here in the first place.
The loud thunder crackles across the darkened sky as a torrential rain falls upon the world of Minecraft. The gales blew across the taiga strongly, shaking trees as it past. The woman rests her head on the body of the spider, her clothes soaking wet from the thunderstorm. She sobbed loudly as she lay there on the spider’s body. Shot mercilessly by a villager, the spider was dead long before she came. Long before she arrived at the cliff.
She turned her head to face the spider’s back where the arrow is punctured deep beside it. Her eyes that were covered in tears, could make out some sort of poison spilling out a little from the tip. Through pain and tears, she removed the arrow that was embedded on the spider’s back and examined the green liquid. It was a poison of her village.
She glanced to the spider then at the arrow, a thought came before her. She fought back the tears that streamed down her cheek and struggled to find strength in the depression that tainted her. She held the arrow with both hands, the tip facing her chest. She closed her eyes, letting the rain fall over her face. She breathed the last, and stabbed herself with the poisoned arrow.
Hey!
If you liked my stuff! Please leave a comment below on what you think overally on my story! Also vote on my poll! Don't hesitate to click no or provide negative comments, I would be glad to improve myself as I so.
If you want, you can check out my previous, and shorter fan fiction : The Last Walk
Thanks much! Loves and smiley faces!
Also, when she fell, from there, I began reading the story with a
I don't exactly know how I feel about the story, which is good. It really got to me as a reader, this is probably one of the best short fictions I've read here! Great job.
http://www.minecraftforum.net/topic/1965046-click-minecraft-fan-fic/
Oncie finally read one of my works!
More feedbacks are welcomed!
If not, I hate you.
I suppose maybe I like your work very much, I'm willing you would look at mine?
I don't see a clear reason really. Just felt like it.
Planning to make a secret ending by tomorrow or sometime.