Ardania is a quiet little place nobody ever really visits it. Rumors say that it was started by some witch craft or voodism. But I know the true story......
Long ago lets say thirty years or so? A king named Edward ruled the place it was a huge place. Turns out the king was actually the guy who did all the witch craft. Legends say fifty years ago before Edwards era of being a king three kings ruled the land. But they bickered and bickered a lot, so one of the king's sons decide to poison all three kings and kill them so he could stop the fighting. It was Edward. Nobody in the kingdom thought a thirteen year old would do such a thing to the kings of the land everyone grew mad. They almost killed Edward but he escaped in time. When he turnt sixty three he became king of the land.
But another legend says the three kings who got killed
possesed Edward and
thats why the
people rebeled
aganist
him.
This is how Ardania started (Or the third king got elected).
So I'm not going to be brutal but... I would work on your formatting. Centered is hard to read, I recommend using left align.
Second, most of those sentences are short and choppy, more like notes taken from a book than a story you are telling. I would advise slow down a little and tell the story instead of making it look like an overview. If you have any questions, please feel free to message me, I would be more than happy to help!
Love Choerry Motion
Second, most of those sentences are short and choppy, more like notes taken from a book than a story you are telling. I would advise slow down a little and tell the story instead of making it look like an overview. If you have any questions, please feel free to message me, I would be more than happy to help!
2. Its not note taken from a book its a weird little story
3. Its syppose to be a overview
Love Choerry Motion
Yes but even for an overview it is choppy.
Several facts speak against themselves.
TT2000, you are genius.