So I had some fun today with a friend, sniping pigs that I spawned all over the place on a server. So much fun, in fact, that we built a memorial. I also felt like writing, so I wrote a cute little lighthearted story to go with it.
Enjoy reading! I sure enjoyed writing it.
Screenshots:
Story
The Pigocalypse: The Story of Jval and Bandicoot
“Tell as another story, Grandpa! C'mon, pleease?”
Grandpa Jval sighed softly and smiled, reclining slowly in his rocking chair. Behind him a fire crackled merrily in the fireplace, fueled by the last of the family's netherrack. Jval's old diamond sword, Spiritbreaker, hung above the mantle. In front of him, his grandchildren's faces were lit up by the dancing flames. Little Sarah, only 4 years old, and Tommy, 6. Their parents were already in bed after a hard day of work, but the children had snuck out after they'd fallen asleep to hear more stories. Outside the family's little home, a skeleton archer wandered around in the garden. But evil mobs wouldn't be a problem tonight.
“Very well.” Jval smiled at his grandchildren, his long beard glimmering and his eyes twinkling in the firelight. “But first, I need my pipe.”
Little Sarah ran over to fetch it at once. Jval took it from her hands slowly and she sat back down on the rug, waiting patiently as he stuffed and lit some tobacco he'd found in his jacket. He took a long puff, opening his eyes wide before making a smoke ring, making the children giggle in delight at his facial expression. He leaned back again, trying to recall all of the details. Finally, lowering his pipe, he began.
“Do you know where Crater City is, Tommy?” He asked slowly. Tommy answered immediately.
“Oh, of course I know where that is, grandpa!” He said. “Mom took us to the pig racing stadium there, once! No one was racing, though, and it was cold...”
Jval smiled again. “Well, do you remember the statue of the pig in the center of the ring?” He asked.
“Yep! I remember it scared me...” he mumbled, blushing a little. Sarah giggled.
“Well, what if I told you that I was there the day that it was built?” He said. The children leaned in closer, eager to hear more. They knew that this was where the story started. And so it was.
“It was a long time ago.” Jval recalled. “Almost 60 years now, I think. I remember, I was a young builder for Crater City, working with sandstone and wood every day. I even got to blast out the crater that we built in. I remember that progress was slow. Crater City was quite out of the way, you see, and difficult to get to. Supplies were hard to come by, and we were in the desert; the workers were always thirsty.”
Jval took another long pull on his pipe before continuing. “Crater City was unusual from the start. You see, no one had ever built in the Sandy Desert before, because people had always rumored that it was cursed. But we didn't listen. We blasted the crater straight into the sand, only to find one of the largest deposits of netherrack in Minecraftia. Now you must understand, children, that at the time we hardly used netherrack for anything, including our fires. Old stories surrounded that kind of rock, stories of the people who handled it being cursed, transforming, or being whisked away in the night, never to be seen again...”
Jval paused again. Tommy spoke up. “But you didn't believe any of that, did you grandpa?” He asked.
Jval chuckled. “Oh, I believed it. If I'd had my way, we would've filled that hole back in and never come back. But it was my good friend Bandicoot that insisted on continuing the project. He convinced the foremen to keep sending supplies, even when most of the workers went to other projects. I would've transferred too, except that I couldn't convince him to go with me. So we built anyway. We built amazing things; the Pig Racing Stadium, the Train Station... we flattened all the walkways and carved out all of the houses and stores. Oh, there were others of course, but make no mistake; much of what's in that city today was built by me and Bandi...”
“Now, I remember one day we couldn't go any deeper. We hadn't reached the bottom of the crater, but we couldn't go any further without starting to mine into the netherrack. I wanted to end it there. “We can leave it like this!” I told Bandi. But he wouldn't leave. He wanted to finish what we'd started, so we descended ever deeper, tunneling into the netherrack and turning it into someplace you or I could live.”
Jval took pull on his pipe, only to find out that it had gone out. He took his time to relight it, and his grandchildren looked at him with impatience. “What happened next?” Sarah asked.
Jval had finally relit the tobacco. He smiled at his granddaughter before taking another pull, then continuing. “Well, it was then that we found the wizard, of course.” He said. Sarah gasped. Tommy exclaimed, “a wizard?”
Jval nodded. “Indeed. We mined so quickly that we found ourselves inside his home, which had been buried beneath the netherrack deposit. And what a terrible home it was, children. There were all sorts of foul smells and noises, experiments and potions being brewed on shelves in the walls. That was a place of very dark magic.”
“I wanted to leave immediately, of course. I'd known right from the beginning that netherrack was bad luck. I told Bandicoot that we should just block off this place, go back the way we came and warn people to never burrow into the netherrack again. But he wouldn't have any of that. He insisted on exploring every dark corner, looking for anything exciting that he could take and show to the rest of the world, or use while he built. He was so drunk on his own curiosity and excitement that just as we reached the back of the laboratory, we met him.”
Jval's grandchildren gasped again. “You met the wizard?” Sarah squeaked.
Jval laughed. “Well, if by met you mean that he chased us back up the hole we came through while shooting bolts of lightning at our behinds, than yes, we met him. He was very angry that we'd burrowed into his hole, you see. I suppose I would be too! And he was so angry that as soon as we got back up the hole, he sealed it off, and we thought we'd never see him again.”
Jval took another pause.
“But that wasn't the last time we saw the wizard.” He said. “He came back, only a few days later, and stood in the center of the crater. I remember that the netherrack was bubbling around his feet, like it was about to melt. And as Bandi and I stopped working to watch, he raised his hands. In them, he was holding what I could only assume was a pink egg. We had seen it in his house! He'd just labeled it “Experiment 90”, and left it at that. No other description.”
“The egg rose up into the air, and the ground was shaking like it was an earthquake. The wizard shouted an incantation, and disappeared.” Jval continued. “I was running, trying to get back up the crater, but the stairway collapsed. Bandi hadn't moved. He was watching the egg. I turned just as it disappeared into thin air above the rim of the crater. For a second, we were both quite confused. Was that it? The egg had just disappeared? But the ground was still rumbling, and then, out of nowhere, there were pigs!”
The tension broke, and both of the children burst out laughing. “Pigs?” Sarah asked, shaking with her giggles. “Pigs?”
Jval didn't share their laugh, even though they were both all but rolling around on the floor at this point. “But these weren't any ordinary pigs!” he exclaimed. His tone was serious enough to bring his grandchildren back to attention, and they stopped laughing and resumed their seats, looking up at him.
“These pigs were terrible.” Jval said. “With horrible red eyes, and foreheads as hard as stone. They appeared everywhere, more every second. There were hundreds, just popping into existence in front of us! And they were there to take revenge. They began ramming into things, hard stone became gravel as they smashed into it and kept running, not even phased. Myself and Bandi tried to stop them, of course, but it was no use! We simply couldn't do anything. The pigs ran rampant, destroying the city that we had worked so hard to build. And with no other options, we retreated to the train station, climbing up the crater walls and trying to avoid the boulders that the pigs at the top were casting down at us.”
“For awhile, all seemed lost. We didn't know what to do. We were the only two workers left on the project, with everyone else either having gone home for the day or ran off at the first sign of these demonic pigs. We almost gave up. I think we would have, had it not been for the mine cart someone had sent along.”
“To this day, I don't know how those weapons ended up at our train station.” Jval said. “We were preparing ourselves to leave when a single mine cart rolled up. It had one chest, one that was filled with diamond swords, armor, a pair of bows and dozens of arrows. We had never ordered any equipment like that; we'd never needed it. No dungeons had ever been found in our project, and there were only a couple of places outside of the swamps of Seraph that had silverfish infestations. But whatever they were there for, we took up arms immediately. Bandi and I, we knew that now we had what we needed to fight off this piggy menace. And if we didn't, everything we'd worked so hard to build would be destroyed.”
“So we descended again, this time with bows, blades and armor. And the pigs were slain. The battle was mighty; although we could kill one pig easily, or two, or maybe even five, there were hundreds. Time and time again we pushed forward, and time and time again the pigs pushed us back. But we persevered. At the end of the day we triumphed. Our city was in shambles, proud architecture and projects reduced to nothing more than piles of rubble. But we had won.” Jval paused again. He enjoyed that memory. Hours of battle, hundreds of pigs slain, and seeing the damage that had been done to the city... but they had emerged victorious.
“What happened to the wizard?” Sarah asked.
Jval was brought back to Earth abruptly. “I don't know.” He said forlornly. “When we tried to explain what happened to the foremen, how so many demonic pigs had appeared in our city, we dug back down into where his house was. All we found was an empty cavern.”
“So... he's still out there, huh?” Tommy asked, his tone serious.
“Yes, I reckon he is.” Jval said. “Who knows. Maybe you'll be the one to find him.”
Tommy shivered. “I hope not!”
Jval continued. He had one last little chapter to tell. “Once we won, we rebuilt. Soon after, we took some nether from the bottom of the crater and made the pig statue, to commemorate the day. A lot of people look at it and laugh, but to me and Bandi, it always meant something. And maybe now, it'll always mean something to you as well.”
Above the living room, Jval's son and his wife stirred, the floorboards creaking as one of them got out of bed. “Now then, time for bed!” Jval said abruptly. “Better go quick, or you'll be in trouble! I'll be there to tuck you in in just a moment.”
The children both ran into their rooms, trying to get into bed before one of their parents came downstairs. Jval smiled again and shook his head, taking another pull on his pipe. The fire behind him continued to crackle, like it was laughing with him.
Jval's son came downstairs a moment later, looking for a drink of water from the kitchen. All he saw was Jval, rocking back and forth in front of the fire, but he knew. “Keeping them up with stories again, pop?” He asked. Jval just kept smiling as his son went into the kitchen, got his water and went back upstairs. “Good night!” He called softly.
“Good night.” Jval replied, before slowly rising to go tuck in his grandchildren.
Enjoy reading! I sure enjoyed writing it.
Screenshots:
Story
“Tell as another story, Grandpa! C'mon, pleease?”
Grandpa Jval sighed softly and smiled, reclining slowly in his rocking chair. Behind him a fire crackled merrily in the fireplace, fueled by the last of the family's netherrack. Jval's old diamond sword, Spiritbreaker, hung above the mantle. In front of him, his grandchildren's faces were lit up by the dancing flames. Little Sarah, only 4 years old, and Tommy, 6. Their parents were already in bed after a hard day of work, but the children had snuck out after they'd fallen asleep to hear more stories. Outside the family's little home, a skeleton archer wandered around in the garden. But evil mobs wouldn't be a problem tonight.
“Very well.” Jval smiled at his grandchildren, his long beard glimmering and his eyes twinkling in the firelight. “But first, I need my pipe.”
Little Sarah ran over to fetch it at once. Jval took it from her hands slowly and she sat back down on the rug, waiting patiently as he stuffed and lit some tobacco he'd found in his jacket. He took a long puff, opening his eyes wide before making a smoke ring, making the children giggle in delight at his facial expression. He leaned back again, trying to recall all of the details. Finally, lowering his pipe, he began.
“Do you know where Crater City is, Tommy?” He asked slowly. Tommy answered immediately.
“Oh, of course I know where that is, grandpa!” He said. “Mom took us to the pig racing stadium there, once! No one was racing, though, and it was cold...”
Jval smiled again. “Well, do you remember the statue of the pig in the center of the ring?” He asked.
“Yep! I remember it scared me...” he mumbled, blushing a little. Sarah giggled.
“Well, what if I told you that I was there the day that it was built?” He said. The children leaned in closer, eager to hear more. They knew that this was where the story started. And so it was.
“It was a long time ago.” Jval recalled. “Almost 60 years now, I think. I remember, I was a young builder for Crater City, working with sandstone and wood every day. I even got to blast out the crater that we built in. I remember that progress was slow. Crater City was quite out of the way, you see, and difficult to get to. Supplies were hard to come by, and we were in the desert; the workers were always thirsty.”
Jval took another long pull on his pipe before continuing. “Crater City was unusual from the start. You see, no one had ever built in the Sandy Desert before, because people had always rumored that it was cursed. But we didn't listen. We blasted the crater straight into the sand, only to find one of the largest deposits of netherrack in Minecraftia. Now you must understand, children, that at the time we hardly used netherrack for anything, including our fires. Old stories surrounded that kind of rock, stories of the people who handled it being cursed, transforming, or being whisked away in the night, never to be seen again...”
Jval paused again. Tommy spoke up. “But you didn't believe any of that, did you grandpa?” He asked.
Jval chuckled. “Oh, I believed it. If I'd had my way, we would've filled that hole back in and never come back. But it was my good friend Bandicoot that insisted on continuing the project. He convinced the foremen to keep sending supplies, even when most of the workers went to other projects. I would've transferred too, except that I couldn't convince him to go with me. So we built anyway. We built amazing things; the Pig Racing Stadium, the Train Station... we flattened all the walkways and carved out all of the houses and stores. Oh, there were others of course, but make no mistake; much of what's in that city today was built by me and Bandi...”
“Now, I remember one day we couldn't go any deeper. We hadn't reached the bottom of the crater, but we couldn't go any further without starting to mine into the netherrack. I wanted to end it there. “We can leave it like this!” I told Bandi. But he wouldn't leave. He wanted to finish what we'd started, so we descended ever deeper, tunneling into the netherrack and turning it into someplace you or I could live.”
Jval took pull on his pipe, only to find out that it had gone out. He took his time to relight it, and his grandchildren looked at him with impatience. “What happened next?” Sarah asked.
Jval had finally relit the tobacco. He smiled at his granddaughter before taking another pull, then continuing. “Well, it was then that we found the wizard, of course.” He said. Sarah gasped. Tommy exclaimed, “a wizard?”
Jval nodded. “Indeed. We mined so quickly that we found ourselves inside his home, which had been buried beneath the netherrack deposit. And what a terrible home it was, children. There were all sorts of foul smells and noises, experiments and potions being brewed on shelves in the walls. That was a place of very dark magic.”
“I wanted to leave immediately, of course. I'd known right from the beginning that netherrack was bad luck. I told Bandicoot that we should just block off this place, go back the way we came and warn people to never burrow into the netherrack again. But he wouldn't have any of that. He insisted on exploring every dark corner, looking for anything exciting that he could take and show to the rest of the world, or use while he built. He was so drunk on his own curiosity and excitement that just as we reached the back of the laboratory, we met him.”
Jval's grandchildren gasped again. “You met the wizard?” Sarah squeaked.
Jval laughed. “Well, if by met you mean that he chased us back up the hole we came through while shooting bolts of lightning at our behinds, than yes, we met him. He was very angry that we'd burrowed into his hole, you see. I suppose I would be too! And he was so angry that as soon as we got back up the hole, he sealed it off, and we thought we'd never see him again.”
Jval took another pause.
“But that wasn't the last time we saw the wizard.” He said. “He came back, only a few days later, and stood in the center of the crater. I remember that the netherrack was bubbling around his feet, like it was about to melt. And as Bandi and I stopped working to watch, he raised his hands. In them, he was holding what I could only assume was a pink egg. We had seen it in his house! He'd just labeled it “Experiment 90”, and left it at that. No other description.”
“The egg rose up into the air, and the ground was shaking like it was an earthquake. The wizard shouted an incantation, and disappeared.” Jval continued. “I was running, trying to get back up the crater, but the stairway collapsed. Bandi hadn't moved. He was watching the egg. I turned just as it disappeared into thin air above the rim of the crater. For a second, we were both quite confused. Was that it? The egg had just disappeared? But the ground was still rumbling, and then, out of nowhere, there were pigs!”
The tension broke, and both of the children burst out laughing. “Pigs?” Sarah asked, shaking with her giggles. “Pigs?”
Jval didn't share their laugh, even though they were both all but rolling around on the floor at this point. “But these weren't any ordinary pigs!” he exclaimed. His tone was serious enough to bring his grandchildren back to attention, and they stopped laughing and resumed their seats, looking up at him.
“These pigs were terrible.” Jval said. “With horrible red eyes, and foreheads as hard as stone. They appeared everywhere, more every second. There were hundreds, just popping into existence in front of us! And they were there to take revenge. They began ramming into things, hard stone became gravel as they smashed into it and kept running, not even phased. Myself and Bandi tried to stop them, of course, but it was no use! We simply couldn't do anything. The pigs ran rampant, destroying the city that we had worked so hard to build. And with no other options, we retreated to the train station, climbing up the crater walls and trying to avoid the boulders that the pigs at the top were casting down at us.”
“For awhile, all seemed lost. We didn't know what to do. We were the only two workers left on the project, with everyone else either having gone home for the day or ran off at the first sign of these demonic pigs. We almost gave up. I think we would have, had it not been for the mine cart someone had sent along.”
“To this day, I don't know how those weapons ended up at our train station.” Jval said. “We were preparing ourselves to leave when a single mine cart rolled up. It had one chest, one that was filled with diamond swords, armor, a pair of bows and dozens of arrows. We had never ordered any equipment like that; we'd never needed it. No dungeons had ever been found in our project, and there were only a couple of places outside of the swamps of Seraph that had silverfish infestations. But whatever they were there for, we took up arms immediately. Bandi and I, we knew that now we had what we needed to fight off this piggy menace. And if we didn't, everything we'd worked so hard to build would be destroyed.”
“So we descended again, this time with bows, blades and armor. And the pigs were slain. The battle was mighty; although we could kill one pig easily, or two, or maybe even five, there were hundreds. Time and time again we pushed forward, and time and time again the pigs pushed us back. But we persevered. At the end of the day we triumphed. Our city was in shambles, proud architecture and projects reduced to nothing more than piles of rubble. But we had won.” Jval paused again. He enjoyed that memory. Hours of battle, hundreds of pigs slain, and seeing the damage that had been done to the city... but they had emerged victorious.
“What happened to the wizard?” Sarah asked.
Jval was brought back to Earth abruptly. “I don't know.” He said forlornly. “When we tried to explain what happened to the foremen, how so many demonic pigs had appeared in our city, we dug back down into where his house was. All we found was an empty cavern.”
“So... he's still out there, huh?” Tommy asked, his tone serious.
“Yes, I reckon he is.” Jval said. “Who knows. Maybe you'll be the one to find him.”
Tommy shivered. “I hope not!”
Jval continued. He had one last little chapter to tell. “Once we won, we rebuilt. Soon after, we took some nether from the bottom of the crater and made the pig statue, to commemorate the day. A lot of people look at it and laugh, but to me and Bandi, it always meant something. And maybe now, it'll always mean something to you as well.”
Above the living room, Jval's son and his wife stirred, the floorboards creaking as one of them got out of bed. “Now then, time for bed!” Jval said abruptly. “Better go quick, or you'll be in trouble! I'll be there to tuck you in in just a moment.”
The children both ran into their rooms, trying to get into bed before one of their parents came downstairs. Jval smiled again and shook his head, taking another pull on his pipe. The fire behind him continued to crackle, like it was laughing with him.
Jval's son came downstairs a moment later, looking for a drink of water from the kitchen. All he saw was Jval, rocking back and forth in front of the fire, but he knew. “Keeping them up with stories again, pop?” He asked. Jval just kept smiling as his son went into the kitchen, got his water and went back upstairs. “Good night!” He called softly.
“Good night.” Jval replied, before slowly rising to go tuck in his grandchildren.