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Let me tell you all a story... hmm... lets see.... where to begin... ah! Well, it all began with falling....
Chapter 1 - Falling (Very short due to headache)
I was falling. How? Where? When? I had no clue. I was wearing a plain white t-shirt and jeans, and really had no time to check myself out considering I was about 300 feet in the sky. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed as I fell, faster and faster. *SPLASH* I landed in a deep pool of water, not bothering to question how the water saved me from such a drop. I looked around, seeing a strange landscape, with no signs of life other than a few animals. I thought as to how I got here, only being able to recall my name, then saying it softly out loud.. "Matthew..." I didn't know what was happening, but it was about noon and I decided to head off north... or west... or was it east? I didn't know, so I just walked in well... whatever direction I was going.


Chapter 2 - The First Night
It felt like only a few hours, but the sun was already setting. Where was I going to to sleep? I saw a small pool of what appeared to be lava, but thought it would be best to keep my distance. Burning alive wasn't a huge interest of mine... As the night set into place I kept walking, faster and faster, hoping to find some place for shelter. It got dark to the point that it was difficult to see, and I thought my best bet was to go in the closest thing I could find to shelter. That cave I saw earlier would be good, but I hadn't bothered to stay there because I was sure there would be something better, but it would have to do. I estimated I was somewhere around a mile from the cave, and I figured it would be a while before I got there. My feet ached, and I was extremely tired, also unsure whether I would stay awake much longer.
That's when the ground seemed to rumble a bit. It was very subtle at first, then it became stronger until *CRUNCH* It was a disgusting sound, almost like a leg snapping in half, and scared me half to death. I turned around to see some strange shape coming out of the earth. I realized it was a human! I still couldn't see his face as he climbed from the small hole he was in, but he looked to be sick and hurt.
"Hey! Are you okay? You look hurt" Much to my dismay, the human, or so I thought, looked up to me with it's soulless eyes and let out a low growl. It came at me, first slowly, but it quickly gained speed. It was only slightly slower than me, but if I hadn't walked all day I could probably outrun it better. What IS this.. thing? It looks dead, but it's moving... I put my thoughts aside and focused on running from the dead thing behind me. I saw a large and thick stick, about the size of a club. I grabbed it, turned around, and swung at the thing, knocking it in the head. The thing fell to the ground, and I stomped on it, realizing how useful these boots were. The thing's head squished much more easily than I imagined, leaving a bloody mess lying on the ground in front of me. I examined it closer. "Is this a.. zombie? They don't exist though! Or.. do they?
As I slowly backed away from the.. zombie... I tripped over what felt like a rock, fell into some sort of deep hole, and blacked out.

Chapter 3 - The Cave
Waking up in the same cave I blacked out in, I groaned at the pain in my left leg and ribs. I look around, and using the small amount of light from the surface, I manage to find a small leather bag. "A bag? What's a bag doing out here?" I said to myself, picking up the bag and inspecting it. It was in good enough shape, but dusty and old. Opening it up revealed a small knife, an empty water bottle, a rope, and a small lantern with a bit of oil left in it. Deciding to climb out of the cave, I throw the rope up many times, attempt to climb manually, and everything else I can think of. Nothing works. Well, if going deeper is the only option... I think to myself. After lighting the lantern, I climb down into the depths of the cave hoping to see some sort of exit. After around twenty minutes I see a metal door welded into the stone wall. "What's this?" I ask myself, as if hoping for some sort of answer. After feeling around for several moments, I feel a strange part of the stone, and press down on it, and the door slowly descends into the ground, a small tunnel with a faint light at the end. Upon further inspection, the light appears to be coming from a large hole in the ground, filled with lava. I hardly notice it at first, but after getting a good look at it, I stumble backwards, seeing a large... metal man... covered in vines and moss standing against the wall. After quickly running towards the closest way out of the room and find myself with two ways to go. Left or right. I almost immediately notice that there is a faint light at then end of the left tunnel. Daylight. I start to walk towards the tunnel when I get a strange tugging feeling in my stomach, giving me the sudden overwhelming urge to take the right tunnel. Slowly walking towards the right tunnel, the sensation feels stronger and stronger until- *CRACK* The ceiling cracks above me, and large piles of debris fall from the crack, forcing me to run through the left tunnel, debris falling behind me. The path goes upwards until leading to another door which was cleverly disguised as part of the hill it was attached to. I look behind me after getting out, seeing the debris. No going back that way...

Chapter 4 - Emily
Will do this one soon! Can't wait for everyone to see what happens in this chapter!

That is WAY to short to be a chapter. That's more like a paragraph! It seems ok, much like the other generic minecraft stories, but it's way to short for chapter, no offense. I do like your descriptions, but you should put in a little more effort to make it a nice story.

Pretty nice, but to short i agree with netherrackcreeper its to short

It's mostly short due to my massive headache right now. Sorry about that. I'm going to take some painkillers and write again once my headache is gone. Thanks for the feedback

There we go! Chapter two is MUCH longer I think.

Anyone?

Hi there,

You have the beginning of a good story line. Grammar seem to be OK. My suggestion is rewrite the story so that not every line starts with "I...". Using "I" in a sentence is OK but not for every sentence and is very distracting to the reader. I struggle with this when I write and have to always go back and edit, edit and edit.

For example:
1. "I had to find a place to sleep. I saw a small pool of what appeared to be lava, but thought it would be best to keep my distance. I wasn't interested in being burned alive. " I would suggest: "Where would I sleep tonight? Glancing around the area around me, I saw a pool of lava which boiled and popped. A chicken aimlessly hopped into the pool and quickly burned to nothing Skirting lava to keep from burning alive, I walked...."

2. "I put my thoughts aside and focused on running from the dead thing behind me. I saw a large and thick stick, about the size of a club. I grabbed it, turned around, and swung at the thing, knocking it in the head. The thing fell to the ground, and I stomped on it, realizing how useful these boots were." I would suggest: "Focusing on running as fast as I could from the dead thing behind me. As I ran, I saw a large and thick stick lay on the ground in front of me. Quickly stopping, I grabbed the stick and swung at the hideous monster. It fell to the ground after I hit it in the head. As I stomped on its head, I realized how useful boots could be."

As always these comments are only suggestions for you. PM me if you make any substantial changes to your story and I'll read it.

Quote from Creakinator

Hi there,

You have the beginning of a good story line. Grammar seem to be OK. My suggestion is rewrite the story so that not every line starts with "I...". Using "I" in a sentence is OK but not for every sentence and is very distracting to the reader. I struggle with this when I write and have to always go back and edit, edit and edit.

For example:
1. "I had to find a place to sleep. I saw a small pool of what appeared to be lava, but thought it would be best to keep my distance. I wasn't interested in being burned alive. " I would suggest: "Where would I sleep tonight? Glancing around the area around me, I saw a pool of lava which boiled and popped. A chicken aimlessly hopped into the pool and quickly burned to nothing Skirting lava to keep from burning alive, I walked...."

2. "I put my thoughts aside and focused on running from the dead thing behind me. I saw a large and thick stick, about the size of a club. I grabbed it, turned around, and swung at the thing, knocking it in the head. The thing fell to the ground, and I stomped on it, realizing how useful these boots were." I would suggest: "Focusing on running as fast as I could from the dead thing behind me. As I ran, I saw a large and thick stick lay on the ground in front of me. Quickly stopping, I grabbed the stick and swung at the hideous monster. It fell to the ground after I hit it in the head. As I stomped on its head, I realized how useful boots could be."

As always these comments are only suggestions for you. PM me if you make any substantial changes to your story and I'll read it.

Thanks for the criticism! I (Hehe did it again) didn't even realize that I was doing that! I'll go and revise the post!

boomp

A

asd

Chapter 3 is complete!

Stop bumping your own post, people can find it themselves. Plus your wall of text hurts my eyes - nothing can be worse then a high brick wall of pure text. The chapters, still short, are getting higher in quality, but try to abstain from repeating "I" that many times in a row, especially in your first chapter. It does have potential like so many other stories I've seen, but some of them go downhill fast. I'd go back and revise those chapters before starting a new one - rushed chapters to get to an important part don't do the novel justice.