OOC
In Game Name: flame_452
Age (Optional):13
Why You're Interested In The Server: I love roleplaying. So I can play in a life i wish i had. c:
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!):I kind of do. I want to be an author when i grow up so i guess im good at making characters.
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): Im not sure how long. It depends when i started playing roblox. Roblox, minecraft and skyrim.
IC
Character Name: Kat Regulus
Character Age:16
Character Personality: Shy, Nomadic, Self Concious and Adventurous.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): Red hair, blue eyes. I dont really know about the clothes.i made my own skin.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): Kat is a wizard. Although most wizards are brave, powerful beings, Kat is very sensitive. Her parents Loki and Sky dissapered when she was eleven years old. They were very powerful mages but not being able to train with them, Kat believes she isnt as powerful as her parents. Although she can be very curious she tends to be very catious in the wilderness. Which is why she travels from village to village, making money by completing quests from the villagers. Where is she headed you ask? Although not many people know what happened to Kat's parents, she plans on finding them. She usually travels alone considering she isnt very good at making friends. She can be very shy. There is a reason to that. Two actually. First, she used to stay home with her parents all the time and now that they are gone, she has nobody to talk to. Second, When her parents left, she visited the guild in her village and applied there. She made a friend named Meledy. Meledy planned to help Kat find her parents so they left the village. Sadly, while they were traveling to the next village meledy was killed by a rogue. That was the only friend Kat ever made so she doesnt plan on making new ones. One day, Kat comes across a village and hears rumors about her parents being in a nearby village. They had joined a guild and went out on a job but hasnt returned in two years. Although its commin according to the job they took. So Kat goes to that village and joins the guild. What else is there to do? Wait or Go out to find them? They could be anywhere. So Kat waits, but with nowhere to go she stays at the guild over night and due to the friendly guild members and villagers, Kat has no choice but to make friends. (sorry its a little long. c:
OOC
In Game Name: flame_452
Age (Optional):13
Why You're Interested In The Server: I love roleplaying. So I can play in a life i wish i had. c:
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!):I kind of do. I want to be an author when i grow up so i guess im good at making characters.
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): Im not sure how long. It depends when i started playing roblox. Roblox, minecraft and skyrim.
IC
Character Name: Kat Regulus
Character Age:16
Character Personality: Shy, Nomadic, Self Concious and Adventurous.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): Red hair, blue eyes. I dont really know about the clothes.i made my own skin.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): Kat is a wizard. Although most wizards are brave, powerful beings, Kat is very sensitive. Her parents Loki and Sky dissapered when she was eleven years old. They were very powerful mages but not being able to train with them, Kat believes she isnt as powerful as her parents. Although she can be very curious she tends to be very catious in the wilderness. Which is why she travels from village to village, making money by completing quests from the villagers. Where is she headed you ask? Although not many people know what happened to Kat's parents, she plans on finding them. She usually travels alone considering she isnt very good at making friends. She can be very shy. There is a reason to that. Two actually. First, she used to stay home with her parents all the time and now that they are gone, she has nobody to talk to. Second, When her parents left, she visited the guild in her village and applied there. She made a friend named Meledy. Meledy planned to help Kat find her parents so they left the village. Sadly, while they were traveling to the next village meledy was killed by a rogue. That was the only friend Kat ever made so she doesnt plan on making new ones. One day, Kat comes across a village and hears rumors about her parents being in a nearby village. They had joined a guild and went out on a job but hasnt returned in two years. Although its commin according to the job they took. So Kat goes to that village and joins the guild. What else is there to do? Wait or Go out to find them? They could be anywhere. So Kat waits, but with nowhere to go she stays at the guild over night and due to the friendly guild members and villagers, Kat has no choice but to make friends. (sorry its a little long. c:
I'm not a whitelister, but I feel as an admin I should give you a few tips and stuff.
First: I saw that you stated your parents were powerful wizards (Which we really refer to as mages but that isn't a big deal) but here in Delenor "powerful" isn't a real thing.. Magic is severely under powered for good reason (Just trust me on that.)
I saw a few spelling/grammatical errors but nothing major.
Names are a bit weird. Don't know why you choose viking lore (Loki) for a name, but still nothing to bad.
The one error I did find is that you already started in the village. Upon arrival to the server you won't be in the village -- You'll be just arriving. For the most part you should change it so you hadn't got there yet. Also the current guild master is a player and may want to meet you before you are automatically living in his guild. Change that and you got my vote.
I'm not a whitelister, but I feel as an admin I should give you a few tips and stuff.
First: I saw that you stated your parents were powerful wizards (Which we really refer to as mages but that isn't a big deal) but here in Delenor "powerful" isn't a real thing.. Magic is severely under powered for good reason (Just trust me on that.)
I saw a few spelling/grammatical errors but nothing major.
Names are a bit weird. Don't know why you choose viking lore (Loki) for a name, but still nothing to bad.
The one error I did find is that you already started in the village. Upon arrival to the server you won't be in the village -- You'll be just arriving. For the most part you should change it so you hadn't got there yet. Also the current guild master is a player and may want to meet you before you are automatically living in his guild. Change that and you got my vote.
Oh, and great job for your age. Keep it up.
I understand what your saying. I probably should of thought about it first. Also, yes the names are weird I got Loki from an anime series but other than that i dont know why i chose the other names. I guess i could change the story but im not sure how i would do it. Like, maybe i could change it to Kat just living in the village and not joining a guild, and the fact that her parents are powerful but they could still be living in the village, and they still went out on a quest so the story line of Kat searching for her parents doesnt change. If you think i should change the story over all just tell me so I can start getting ideas and maybe you could give me some tips on what to start with. I will, for sure, get some new names because now that i think about it, the names are a little too...i think the word could be colorful or over creative?
I understand what your saying. I probably should of thought about it first. Also, yes the names are weird I got Loki from an anime series but other than that i dont know why i chose the other names. I guess i could change the story but im not sure how i would do it. Like, maybe i could change it to Kat just living in the village and not joining a guild, and the fact that her parents are powerful but they could still be living in the village, and they still went out on a quest so the story line of Kat searching for her parents doesnt change. If you think i should change the story over all just tell me so I can start getting ideas and maybe you could give me some tips on what to start with. I will, for sure, get some new names because now that i think about it, the names are a little too...i think the word could be colorful or over creative?
I just read over it and forgot to mention that i will change it to (Insert Player Name Here) just arriving at the village.
flame_452 I'll accept you although your backstory still says you're already in the mages guild. Fair warning: The server has been really slow so far, I'm hoping it picks up.
OOC
In Game Name: 1new6
Age (Optional): 14
Why You're Interested In The Server: i have been looking for a good rp server
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I have been role playing for about 3 years and I have been an admin on an rp server and I have owned a rp server
IC
Character Name: Naret Ferlin
Character Age: 24
Character Personality: he doesn’t trust much if anything much less anyone. He is usually quite cautious and doesn’t take risks with things that are important like his money or his life.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): he has prominent cheek bones and chin, his eyes are blue with flecks of green and his hair is a reddish brown, he is also quite slim with little muscle.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): as he looks over the bricks covered in ivy and the rotting frames of the buildings around him as he remembered the terrible day, they had come.... He looked out at the village then still with lamps lighting the streets and in the waning light he could still see the younger children playing in the street. He looked back into the darkening woods and started walking back towards the small town wishing mama had managed to get some of the bakers bread for the meal but at least his father had managed to trap the young quail that morning so they wouldn’t go hungry again that night, that’s when he looked up again hearing the sound of hooves hitting the muddy path and of yells and screams from the town, he ran forward around the last tree blocking his view of the town and was greeted by a sight of horror, there he saw men draped in dark black and gray hoods and crude leather armor slashing at his friends and elders with rusty axes and swords striking them down were they stood hacking away at their skin and ripping away their lives, he saw men carrying torches and burning their houses and others taking the few valuables they had from their owners, that was when he saw his mother and father they were pressed against a wall his father wielding a small iron hammer but as Naret stood and watched he was stabbed through the chest by a lone dagger ,his mother followed. He let out a cry and tried to rush forward and kill the terrible men and rip out their hearts one by one even with their massive advantage of numbers weapons and armor, then his father looked up at him and Naret saw him whisper something, as Naret tried to run forward he was thrown back into the forest by a push of air he yelled in furry and tried again but was met by the same result, then one of the men draped in those terrible hoods looked back and saw him then ran towards him brandishing a rusted battle axe. His face streaming with tears Naret looked one last time at the town now almost totally engulfed in flame and whispered the only incantation he had ever managed to pry from his father. He immediately felt the surge of magic coursing through him as he shrunk and hair grew other his body his mouth and nose elongating and claws growing from his finger nails he looked at the blood thirsty man running at him and dashed off into the woods now just a wolf who had silver tears dripping down his muzzle.
OOC
In Game Name: JYLoko
Age (Optional): 17
Why You're Interested In The Server:
done an RP server and it was honestly the best experiance ever but it closed, you seem like you love what your doing and i want to join in on the fun and experiance
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): I do, i bit rough though
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): a few months
IC
Character Name: Caelum
Character Age: 21
Character Personality: Friendly, Thrifty, Mature
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed):
In leather clothes, red headband, black earings, red sash, short sleeve shirt
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.):
Born to a Family on a farm, Caelum grew up working and had the care of his parents. Caelum learned everything he knows from his wise mother and how to be a gentlemen from his knight turned farmer Dad. He would go on to be joined by his brothers Ignis and Terra and his Sisters Aqua and Nix. While rummaging through the family barn, he found his fathers sword and his red bandana. He confronted his father about this and was told a story. His father belonged to a Kingsguard with the sword being evidence. The red bandana told another story however. While serving the king, he was thrown into a civil war, with a band of renengades on one side and the King on the other. He Began the war on the Kings side, but switched sides when the king started to kill his officers out of fustration. The rebels had worn red bandanas signifying the blood of their brothers and freedom. When he adorned the Red, he became apart of a Brotherhood, The Red Brotherhood. He went on to fight the very King he had sworn to protect through the War. When eventually the Rebels won and peace was established his father left settled down. Inspired by these stories of his Father, Caelum decided that on his 21st nameday, he will go out and take on the world and become a Knight just like his dad, or maybe better than him.
1new6..You clearly didn't read the server lore, your backstory doesn't work at all.
JYLoko, I thoroughly enjoyed your application, accepted. (Again, be warned that the server is going slow, and I have school on weekdays so I won't be on until 5 PM my timeish)
OOC
In Game Name: 1new6
Age (Optional): 14
Why You're Interested In The Server: i have been looking for a good rp server
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I have been role playing for about 3 years and I have been an admin on an rp server and I have owned a rp server
IC
Character Name: Naret Ferlin
Character Age: 24
Character Personality: he doesn’t trust much if anything much less anyone. He is usually quite cautious and doesn’t take risks with things that are important like his money or his life.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): he has prominent cheek bones and chin, his eyes are blue with flecks of green and his hair is a reddish brown, he is also quite slim with little muscle.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): as he looks over the bricks covered in ivy and the rotting frames of the buildings around him as he remembered the terrible day, they had come.... He looked out at the village then still with lamps lighting the streets and in the waning light he could still see the younger children playing in the street. He looked back into the darkening woods and started walking back towards the small town wishing mama had managed to get some of the bakers bread for the meal but at least his father had managed to trap the young quail that morning so they wouldn’t go hungry again that night, that’s when he looked up again hearing the sound of hooves hitting the muddy path and of yells and screams from the town, he ran forward around the last tree blocking his view of the town and was greeted by a sight of horror, there he saw men draped in dark black and gray hoods and crude leather armor slashing at his friends and elders with rusty axes and swords striking them down were they stood hacking away at their skin and ripping away their lives, he saw men carrying torches and burning their houses and others taking the few valuables they had from their owners, that was when he saw his mother and father they were pressed against a wall his father wielding a small iron hammer but as Naret stood and watched he was stabbed through the chest by a lone dagger ,his mother followed. He let out a cry and tried to rush forward and kill the terrible men and rip out their hearts one by one even with their massive advantage of numbers weapons and armor, then his father looked up at him and Naret saw him whisper something, as Naret tried to run forward he was thrown back into the forest by a push of air he yelled in furry and tried again but was met by the same result, then one of the men draped in those terrible hoods looked back and saw him then ran towards him brandishing a rusted battle axe. His face streaming with tears Naret looked one last time at the town now almost totally engulfed in flame and whispered the only incantation he had ever managed to pry from his father. He immediately felt the surge of magic coursing through him as he shrunk and hair grew other his body his mouth and nose elongating and claws growing from his finger nails he looked at the blood thirsty man running at him and dashed off into the woods now just a wolf who had silver tears dripping down his muzzle.
First big problem I noticed was grammar. Your better than most kids your age, I'll give you that. But you seem to have issues with capitalization and punctuation. Read your story out loud, you'll notice if sentences are to long. A lot of your sentences ran on, and that is something that needs a bit of work.
Second big problem (And my main one) is that you took the traditional route and made him a orphan. You, as a server owner, should know just how annoying it is to see this.
There were a couple other things wrong. Magic for example. Magic is increadibly weak, and as a child you were able to morph into a wolf? There are masters in the server that can barely make full size fire balls. Also, you didn't go in deph much.. I didn't figure out his father was a mage until you said he learned the spell from his dad.
I looked at your server, and you seem to know enough about roleplaying that I'm not worried.. You provided a RP tutorial in your topic, and from what I saw you know how pretty well.
Work on those things and you got my vote.
Just noticed you replied Rakaesa. I forgot to check the next page xD
OOC
In Game Name: 1new6
Age (Optional): 14
Why You're Interested In The Server: i have been looking for a good rp server
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I have been role playing for about 3 years and I have been an admin on an rp server and I have owned a rp server
IC
Character Name: Naret Ferlin
Character Age: 24
Character Personality: he doesn’t trust much if anything much less anyone. He is usually quite cautious and doesn’t take risks with things that are important like his money or his life.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): he has prominent cheek bones and chin, his eyes are blue with flecks of green and his hair is a reddish brown, he is also quite slim with little muscle.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): As he looks over the bricks covered in ivy and the rotting frames of the buildings around him as he remembered the terrible day, they had come.... He looked out at the village then still with lamps lighting the streets and in the waning light he could still see the younger children playing in the street. He looked back into the darkening woods and started walking back towards the small town wishing mama had managed to get some of the baker’s bread for the meal but at least his father had managed to trap the young quail that morning so they wouldn’t go hungry again that night. That’s when he looked up again hearing the sound of hooves hitting the muddy path and of yells and screams from the town, he ran forward around the last tree blocking his view of the town and was greeted by a sight of horror, there he saw men draped in dark black and gray hoods and crude leather armor slashing at his friends and elders with rusty axes and swords striking them down were they stood hacking away at their skin and ripping away their lives, he saw men carrying torches and burning their houses and others taking the few valuables they had from their owners. That was when he saw his mother and father they were pressed against a wall his father wielding a small iron hammer but as Naret stood and watched he was stabbed through the chest by a lone dagger, his mother followed. He let out a cry and tried to rush forward and kill the terrible men and rip out their hearts one by one even with their massive advantage of numbers weapons and armor, then his father looked up at him and Naret saw him pleading in his eyes that he would run, that he would run and not come back. One of the men in the accused grey hoods looked over his shoulder and right at Naret standing stricken with grief in the muddy road to the forest that was now in the setting sun the color of dried blood. The man raised his hefty axe and charged at him roaring a cry of anger that any of the town were to escape them. Naret did the only thing he could do. Run. He crashed through the forest dodging thorn covered bushes and low branches wile hearing the crazed cry of the man chasing him. As Naret dashed over a small clearing he stumbled and fell into a small ditch he had not seen before, as he looked up seeing the final specks of light fading and hearing the cries of his hunter, he muttered a small spell the only thing he had managed to pry from his father. Slowly the grass mostly covering the cave entrance grew just enough that it covered the entrance completely and with that Naret slumped to the floor panting, a silver tear falling to the ground as he heard his pursuer pass.
OOC
In Game Name: NiteMiner
Age (Optional): 20
Why You're Interested In The Server: Roleplaying on Minecraft sounds fun
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): Yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I couldn't really say how long I've been doing it, I don't do it often but when I do I make sure things go smoothly.
IC
Character Name: TimLach
Character Age: 20
Character Personality: He does what he has to do, and lives underground. He has a mysterious aspect to him and the few who know him often wonder about him.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): My skin is grey, I have black hair and wear black clothing. My shirt has my emblem on it.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.):NiteMiner had a pretty good past, grew up with many friends and was always happy, then later on in life his friends ended up turning into scumbags who did drugs and listening to garbage music that promotes crime and drug usage so he left them behind and moved on. As NiteMiner got into his later teen years he started questioning everything around him, life, how things worked, the system, so he started truth seeking and figured out that the world he lived in, was full of lies and deceit.
NiteMiner is now 20, has only a few friends, most are new from the old bunch, and his focus is now on making money and stocking up on silver. NiteMiner is now a secretive man, but also a very caring man. He tries to keep his emotions inside but every once in a while he breaks down. NiteMiner lives underground, sometimes he refers to himself as the underground, collecting data and knowing things he shouldn't.NiteMiner also has no magical abilities, he's as human as it gets.
1new6, it's still a bit of a cliche backstory, but it's certainly well written, and there's no magic problems this time. Accepted!
NiteMiner, before I read your application at all...your character name is the same as your in game name. Makes no sense at all, make a proper name please.
1new6, it's still a bit of a cliche backstory, but it's certainly well written, and there's no magic problems this time. Accepted!
NiteMiner, before I read your application at all...your character name is the same as your in game name. Makes no sense at all, make a proper name please.
In Game Name: flame_452
Age (Optional):13
Why You're Interested In The Server: I love roleplaying. So I can play in a life i wish i had. c:
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!):I kind of do. I want to be an author when i grow up so i guess im good at making characters.
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): Im not sure how long. It depends when i started playing roblox. Roblox, minecraft and skyrim.
IC
Character Name: Kat Regulus
Character Age:16
Character Personality: Shy, Nomadic, Self Concious and Adventurous.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): Red hair, blue eyes. I dont really know about the clothes.i made my own skin.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): Kat is a wizard. Although most wizards are brave, powerful beings, Kat is very sensitive. Her parents Loki and Sky dissapered when she was eleven years old. They were very powerful mages but not being able to train with them, Kat believes she isnt as powerful as her parents. Although she can be very curious she tends to be very catious in the wilderness. Which is why she travels from village to village, making money by completing quests from the villagers. Where is she headed you ask? Although not many people know what happened to Kat's parents, she plans on finding them. She usually travels alone considering she isnt very good at making friends. She can be very shy. There is a reason to that. Two actually. First, she used to stay home with her parents all the time and now that they are gone, she has nobody to talk to. Second, When her parents left, she visited the guild in her village and applied there. She made a friend named Meledy. Meledy planned to help Kat find her parents so they left the village. Sadly, while they were traveling to the next village meledy was killed by a rogue. That was the only friend Kat ever made so she doesnt plan on making new ones. One day, Kat comes across a village and hears rumors about her parents being in a nearby village. They had joined a guild and went out on a job but hasnt returned in two years. Although its commin according to the job they took. So Kat goes to that village and joins the guild. What else is there to do? Wait or Go out to find them? They could be anywhere. So Kat waits, but with nowhere to go she stays at the guild over night and due to the friendly guild members and villagers, Kat has no choice but to make friends. (sorry its a little long. c:
I'm not a whitelister, but I feel as an admin I should give you a few tips and stuff.
First: I saw that you stated your parents were powerful wizards (Which we really refer to as mages but that isn't a big deal) but here in Delenor "powerful" isn't a real thing.. Magic is severely under powered for good reason (Just trust me on that.)
I saw a few spelling/grammatical errors but nothing major.
Names are a bit weird. Don't know why you choose viking lore (Loki) for a name, but still nothing to bad.
The one error I did find is that you already started in the village. Upon arrival to the server you won't be in the village -- You'll be just arriving. For the most part you should change it so you hadn't got there yet. Also the current guild master is a player and may want to meet you before you are automatically living in his guild. Change that and you got my vote.
Oh, and great job for your age. Keep it up.
I understand what your saying. I probably should of thought about it first. Also, yes the names are weird
I just read over it and forgot to mention that i will change it to (Insert Player Name Here) just arriving at the village.
Please follow this guide: http://www.douban.com/group/topic/2787032/
Oh, and bump.
I had too xD
In Game Name: 1new6
Age (Optional): 14
Why You're Interested In The Server: i have been looking for a good rp server
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I have been role playing for about 3 years and I have been an admin on an rp server and I have owned a rp server
IC
Character Name: Naret Ferlin
Character Age: 24
Character Personality: he doesn’t trust much if anything much less anyone. He is usually quite cautious and doesn’t take risks with things that are important like his money or his life.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): he has prominent cheek bones and chin, his eyes are blue with flecks of green and his hair is a reddish brown, he is also quite slim with little muscle.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): as he looks over the bricks covered in ivy and the rotting frames of the buildings around him as he remembered the terrible day, they had come.... He looked out at the village then still with lamps lighting the streets and in the waning light he could still see the younger children playing in the street. He looked back into the darkening woods and started walking back towards the small town wishing mama had managed to get some of the bakers bread for the meal but at least his father had managed to trap the young quail that morning so they wouldn’t go hungry again that night, that’s when he looked up again hearing the sound of hooves hitting the muddy path and of yells and screams from the town, he ran forward around the last tree blocking his view of the town and was greeted by a sight of horror, there he saw men draped in dark black and gray hoods and crude leather armor slashing at his friends and elders with rusty axes and swords striking them down were they stood hacking away at their skin and ripping away their lives, he saw men carrying torches and burning their houses and others taking the few valuables they had from their owners, that was when he saw his mother and father they were pressed against a wall his father wielding a small iron hammer but as Naret stood and watched he was stabbed through the chest by a lone dagger ,his mother followed. He let out a cry and tried to rush forward and kill the terrible men and rip out their hearts one by one even with their massive advantage of numbers weapons and armor, then his father looked up at him and Naret saw him whisper something, as Naret tried to run forward he was thrown back into the forest by a push of air he yelled in furry and tried again but was met by the same result, then one of the men draped in those terrible hoods looked back and saw him then ran towards him brandishing a rusted battle axe. His face streaming with tears Naret looked one last time at the town now almost totally engulfed in flame and whispered the only incantation he had ever managed to pry from his father. He immediately felt the surge of magic coursing through him as he shrunk and hair grew other his body his mouth and nose elongating and claws growing from his finger nails he looked at the blood thirsty man running at him and dashed off into the woods now just a wolf who had silver tears dripping down his muzzle.
In Game Name: JYLoko
Age (Optional): 17
Why You're Interested In The Server:
done an RP server and it was honestly the best experiance ever but it closed, you seem like you love what your doing and i want to join in on the fun and experiance
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): I do, i bit rough though
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): a few months
IC
Character Name: Caelum
Character Age: 21
Character Personality: Friendly, Thrifty, Mature
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed):
In leather clothes, red headband, black earings, red sash, short sleeve shirt
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.):
Born to a Family on a farm, Caelum grew up working and had the care of his parents. Caelum learned everything he knows from his wise mother and how to be a gentlemen from his knight turned farmer Dad. He would go on to be joined by his brothers Ignis and Terra and his Sisters Aqua and Nix. While rummaging through the family barn, he found his fathers sword and his red bandana. He confronted his father about this and was told a story. His father belonged to a Kingsguard with the sword being evidence. The red bandana told another story however. While serving the king, he was thrown into a civil war, with a band of renengades on one side and the King on the other. He Began the war on the Kings side, but switched sides when the king started to kill his officers out of fustration. The rebels had worn red bandanas signifying the blood of their brothers and freedom. When he adorned the Red, he became apart of a Brotherhood, The Red Brotherhood. He went on to fight the very King he had sworn to protect through the War. When eventually the Rebels won and peace was established his father left settled down. Inspired by these stories of his Father, Caelum decided that on his 21st nameday, he will go out and take on the world and become a Knight just like his dad, or maybe better than him.
JYLoko, I thoroughly enjoyed your application, accepted. (Again, be warned that the server is going slow, and I have school on weekdays so I won't be on until 5 PM my timeish)
First big problem I noticed was grammar. Your better than most kids your age, I'll give you that. But you seem to have issues with capitalization and punctuation. Read your story out loud, you'll notice if sentences are to long. A lot of your sentences ran on, and that is something that needs a bit of work.
Second big problem (And my main one) is that you took the traditional route and made him a orphan. You, as a server owner, should know just how annoying it is to see this.
There were a couple other things wrong. Magic for example. Magic is increadibly weak, and as a child you were able to morph into a wolf? There are masters in the server that can barely make full size fire balls. Also, you didn't go in deph much.. I didn't figure out his father was a mage until you said he learned the spell from his dad.
I looked at your server, and you seem to know enough about roleplaying that I'm not worried.. You provided a RP tutorial in your topic, and from what I saw you know how pretty well.
Work on those things and you got my vote.
Just noticed you replied Rakaesa. I forgot to check the next page xD
In Game Name: 1new6
Age (Optional): 14
Why You're Interested In The Server: i have been looking for a good rp server
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I have been role playing for about 3 years and I have been an admin on an rp server and I have owned a rp server
IC
Character Name: Naret Ferlin
Character Age: 24
Character Personality: he doesn’t trust much if anything much less anyone. He is usually quite cautious and doesn’t take risks with things that are important like his money or his life.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): he has prominent cheek bones and chin, his eyes are blue with flecks of green and his hair is a reddish brown, he is also quite slim with little muscle.
Character Backstory(The more detailed the better, but I'll ask for quality over quantity. Make it interesting first, long afterwards. 2-3 paragraphs of decent length will do fine.): As he looks over the bricks covered in ivy and the rotting frames of the buildings around him as he remembered the terrible day, they had come.... He looked out at the village then still with lamps lighting the streets and in the waning light he could still see the younger children playing in the street. He looked back into the darkening woods and started walking back towards the small town wishing mama had managed to get some of the baker’s bread for the meal but at least his father had managed to trap the young quail that morning so they wouldn’t go hungry again that night. That’s when he looked up again hearing the sound of hooves hitting the muddy path and of yells and screams from the town, he ran forward around the last tree blocking his view of the town and was greeted by a sight of horror, there he saw men draped in dark black and gray hoods and crude leather armor slashing at his friends and elders with rusty axes and swords striking them down were they stood hacking away at their skin and ripping away their lives, he saw men carrying torches and burning their houses and others taking the few valuables they had from their owners. That was when he saw his mother and father they were pressed against a wall his father wielding a small iron hammer but as Naret stood and watched he was stabbed through the chest by a lone dagger, his mother followed. He let out a cry and tried to rush forward and kill the terrible men and rip out their hearts one by one even with their massive advantage of numbers weapons and armor, then his father looked up at him and Naret saw him pleading in his eyes that he would run, that he would run and not come back. One of the men in the accused grey hoods looked over his shoulder and right at Naret standing stricken with grief in the muddy road to the forest that was now in the setting sun the color of dried blood. The man raised his hefty axe and charged at him roaring a cry of anger that any of the town were to escape them. Naret did the only thing he could do. Run. He crashed through the forest dodging thorn covered bushes and low branches wile hearing the crazed cry of the man chasing him. As Naret dashed over a small clearing he stumbled and fell into a small ditch he had not seen before, as he looked up seeing the final specks of light fading and hearing the cries of his hunter, he muttered a small spell the only thing he had managed to pry from his father. Slowly the grass mostly covering the cave entrance grew just enough that it covered the entrance completely and with that Naret slumped to the floor panting, a silver tear falling to the ground as he heard his pursuer pass.
In Game Name: NiteMiner
Age (Optional): 20
Why You're Interested In The Server: Roleplaying on Minecraft sounds fun
Do you know how to roleplay? (Say so if you don't!): Yes
If yes, how long have you been roleplaying? (And, optional, on what games?): I couldn't really say how long I've been doing it, I don't do it often but when I do I make sure things go smoothly.
IC
Character Name: Tim Lach
Character Age: 20
Character Personality: He does what he has to do, and lives underground. He has a mysterious aspect to him and the few who know him often wonder about him.
Character Physical Description (Preferably your minecraft skin, describe if needed): My skin is grey, I have black hair and wear black clothing. My shirt has my emblem on it.
NiteMiner is now 20, has only a few friends, most are new from the old bunch, and his focus is now on making money and stocking up on silver. NiteMiner is now a secretive man, but also a very caring man. He tries to keep his emotions inside but every once in a while he breaks down. NiteMiner lives underground, sometimes he refers to himself as the underground, collecting data and knowing things he shouldn't. NiteMiner also has no magical abilities, he's as human as it gets.
NiteMiner, before I read your application at all...your character name is the same as your in game name. Makes no sense at all, make a proper name please.
thanks