If you don't know what shadow mute is it's when your muted but you don't know it. You can see what you said but everyone else cant see what you said. I'm shadow muted and it's been going on like this for months now. And there are many others who have been muted for way longer. I don't even know why I'm shadow muted but a suggestion is that the mutes aren't permanent. Many people are trying to have fun in the game and talk but most of them are experiencing this type of mute. Instead of being completely shadow muted there should be an increasing amount of time you are muted. For e.g., someone cussed once throughout their time of playing minecraft then they are muted for a few days or so. The more a player cusses, the longer they are muted. Many players are shadow muted for no reason. I contacted minecraft but they did not reply for many weeks and still haven't done so. In some threads, minecraft or Microsoft isn't willing to talk about shadow mute which is disappointing and sad for many players. I hope minecraft fixes this issue.
Edit: I used to think the mute was from the admin of the specific server but after contacting them, it turns out it wasn't them that had muted some players
I'm 99.9% sure this is not an actual thing in Minecraft. Mojang has long had a stance that they don't care what happens on Servers and that they should be able to police themselves. Microsoft may have something like this built into Xbox Live as far as their moderation but I've never heard of it. From a little bit of research it could be related to your Privacy and Online Safety settings: https://privacy.microsoft.com/en-us/xbox-one-privacy-and-online-safety
Either way, this sounds like something you would need to talk to Microsoft about directly.
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I also used to think that the admins on individual servers are using it. However a friend of mine who is also muted contacted the specific server and got an email back saying how the admins never muted him in the first place. So he went back to Minecraft and spoke but he was still muted. But thank you ^^