You can go to the "looking for" forum here on Planet minecraftand post what kind of a server you want to play on and maybe someone will reply. You can also go to the "servers" forum under the Serves: Java Edition heading and search through the lists of servers that people have posted. Some are very large, some are very small. There's also places like planetminecraft.com, and various othe rserver list sites you can google, many of which will let you explore the listings according to criteria, such as "vanilla".
Finding the perfect server can be a chore, and usually takes time if you have very specific wish lists they need to fulfill. Luckily, yours seems pretty to the point and I"m sure there's vanilla servers out there for you to play!