I'd just like to say I've only read the first 5 or so pages, so somebody may have replied to this already, but I feel the need to point something out:
This is CRAZY. The kicking issue isn't really that much of an issue, and I'll bet the people hat kicked him didn't even think of it as bullying. However, when you notify the school, the kids that kicked him, even the ones that were just there and never actually kicked him, are all going to get disproportional punishments because they were "bullying" a kid. They were probably just going to relax and have fun, kicked your child because they're twelve year olds and think it will be worth a laugh, and now that your kid threw a fit because he has to press a button and reconnect that kid is going to get a suspension or referral for something he didn't even do it school.
Or, if the powers that be are smart, they'll laugh you out of the office. I'm not saying this to be a jerk. I'm saying this because you are freaking out over what is essentially a harmless joke some 12 year olds pulled. I'd get it if they called him names, or swore at him, or destroyed his building (although that's still not contact-school worthy). They did essentially nothing of consequence to him and you are WAY over thinking it.
First of all, I never said I was going to talk to anyone at the school...that was someone else's suggestion (at least they were trying to be helpful). Secondly and sadly, your "boys will be boys" rationalization is just the type of attitude that perpetuates bullying. Furthermore, your qualification of both my son's and my experience is inflammatory and erroneous.
Having said that, I recognize that people are going to believe what they want and say what they want to -- especially with the anonymity afforded by the internet. I'm just grateful that the majority of the responders on this thread have been much more thoughtful.
I joined this forum to express my discontent about this subject. I do not know how to contact MINDCRAFT or their manufacturer.
Basically, we got our 12 year old son an xbox for Christmas. well there's your problem right there, for real He has played Mindcraft online a lot and enjoys it quite a bit. He is somewhat shy socially, insert aspergers joke here and I was pleased to see/hear him playing Mindcraft (he is a good player from what I've seen) with some other kids (all from the comforts of home). A couple of times in the last few days...he has been randomly "kicked out" of the games he was playing in by some of the other boys. One was in a game/party he had initiated. (Edit 1/20: apparently not the case....he was friends with the boy who started it.) okay, so who cares, they're boys, that's what boys do
I do not know the particulars of why this happened. He did not know either...and had asked one of the boys in a private message, but he didn't respond. Some of these kids that got involved in the games are some of the "popular" kids...and I suppose my son just got into a given game by association with someone else on the periphery.
So I'm not necessarily saying it's anyone's responsibility to allow him to keep playing, if they don't want him to play for whatever reason. well yeah that makes sense But this method -- of "kicking someone out" -- and having that message displayed to my son (or whomever)....is ridiculous. no it's not It's bullying in it's basest form. you have a loose definition of "bullying" don't you Like they're on the playground at the school yard, and they won't let him play. who cares that's how life works It's completely random, and without just cause.
I have seen the effect this has had on him...and now he is reluctant to even play....for fear of being kicked off. he can just play singleplayer, the multiplayer communities suck anyway Please don't say "well he must have been doing something wrong". He was not being abusive in any way shape or form (it's in our family room, so I hear every word). it doesn't matter, things work differently on the internet than they do in real life. the creators of that group do have a certain right to kick him out if they want to, and if you're seriously getting upset about that, then that's pretty sad
No one is policing this. And at the very least, if the initiator of a given game can be kicked out, that's just ridiculous. i'm pretty sure that's not true, than again i don't have an xbox so i can't be too sure
My primary gripe is the way this situation is being handled. As I said, I perceive it, it is BULLYING. stop calling it that for christ's sake And it makes me mad...that other boys...have somehow made a FUN experience for my son something that he now will only do with trepidation. how do you know that's why they kicked him out? in fact, you've made it pretty clear you have almost no idea why he was kicked out, so really i think you should be giving them the benefit of the doubt
I don't imagine my son is the only victim of this. I certainly hope there is another adult or someone from Mindcraft who sees this...as I suspect the kids playing are just going to tell me to shut up. shut up
EDIT 1/17: First, yes, I know it's MinEcraft....and secondly, I'm actually the MOM, not the father . Find it funny some people made the assumption I was the latter .... that explains everything
EDIT1/18: For those of you put off by the length of this thread, let me say a few things: first and foremost, if someone took the time and interest to respond to me, I'm certainly going to take the time to respond in kind; second, consider perhaps this topic warrants a "lively" discussion; and finally, you are under no obligation to wade thru it.
EDIT 1/21: Feel like I want to amend this a bit, given a recurrence of the same sort of responses in the thread (I realize people are not going to read the whole thing necessarily). The kicking out that was done was not done by a server. It was done by kids who he knows -- fellow 12 year old 6th graders from his class. I know all the kids he was playing with, there were no older-than-12-year-olds playing. So neither his age nor his interactions with "strangers" did not play into this at all.
to put it shortly, the internet works differently than the real world. you can't really apply the same logic to situations that happen online. also, using anything related to the internet as a chance to "practice social skills" is really never a good idea.
please stop trying to shelter your son from the hardships of life. also stop buying him $200 electronics. he's 12, i think he can have enough fun with a family computer and a bike.
I skimmed through the topic a bit but after 13 pages I am sure most things haven been covered. Thought I might put my opionion in here too. From what I am understanding:
Your 12 year old son plays Minecraft on the xbox360
He was forcibly kicked from the server.
You believe you son was hosting the server
He was playing with 'friends' he knows that turned into some bullies.
There is nothing wrong with younger kids playing Minecraft and I am learning alot of kids do. It seems like your sons friends were just playing around or picking on him. I hosted my own server for friends and friends of friends on the xbox sense the game was released and I urge you to have your son do the same.
Its Peer-to-Peer so everything revolves around the host. If he is not on the game, noone else can get on that world. If someone is being a bully, thief or destroying thing then your son he can kick them (only the host can kick others). He can set the game to public (meaning others can click 'join in progress' to join but they still have to know somone currently in the lobby), Invite only, or he can appear offline so noone is able to join.
He also has options to disallow others from placing, removing, or using blocks and items. So for enstance if two or more players would keep fighting or griefing I would remove there privliges and they would be stuck in whatever room they were in. Like a instant jail. After some time I would give them back the ablilty to place, destroy, and use blocks.
Id add him and invite him to come play with me but I havent been on MC in a few weeks. I been moving more toward the PC.
He could also go online and look for other player hosted servers. Some of them take there server and community very serious with rules although I cannont recommend it because if he gets into a bad server then this could happen all over again in a week.
What's so hard?I hate when people say:Help!I've been kicked out of the server because I am a kid!
In that case,it's not the moderators' fault.It's you fault because you shared your age with everybody on the server.
Yep, I'm 9 I tell people I'm 33 yo guy all the time works great never get kicked.
Hey, I just wanted to drop my mature opinion on this subject as I find it interesting.
To the original poster, I feel for your son. Bullying is a harsh thing, and it worsens when the bullies are online. However, you have to ask youself, is there really anything that we can do to solve the problem?
Every child is bullied at one stage or another. It happens. You really can't do much about it.
I don't really care if he's a necrobumper, he's freaking hilarious. =P
I think I already posted here, so I'll spare you the pain of my political rants about how you censorship and anti-bullying (funny how you never target the REAL bullies) nuts are going to drive our society into the dirt.
I understand your pain, as I am a internet geek. When I play games online, it's not unusual to hear people calling each other s or gay, maybe a death threat or two. If his friends did that, he should either A: ask them why they did it, or B: Get new friends that don't randomly kick people. If he didn't know them, I guess I could understand, if he has a high voice, he'll be considered the "12 year old stereotype."
In conclusion, if he's young, the internet/gaming world is cruel, and you should always watch over him
"So I'm not necessarily saying it's anyone's responsibility to allow him to keep playing, if they don't want him to play for whatever reason. But this method -- of "kicking someone out" -- and having that message displayed to my son (or whomever)....is ridiculous. It's bullying in it's basest form. Like they're on the playground at the school yard, and they won't let him play. It's completely random, and without just cause." There choice to let him play or not, you have no right to call someone a bully just because they may not want to play with your son and only play with the people they want to play with. This is just ridiculous.