I joined this forum to express my discontent about this subject. I do not know how to contact MINDCRAFT or their manufacturer.
Basically, we got our 12 year old son an xbox for Christmas. He has played Mindcraft online a lot and enjoys it quite a bit. He is somewhat shy socially, and I was pleased to see/hear him playing Mindcraft (he is a good player from what I've seen) with some other kids (all from the comforts of home). A couple of times in the last few days...he has been randomly "kicked out" of the games he was playing in by some of the other boys. One was in a game/party he had initiated. (Edit 1/20: apparently not the case....he was friends with the boy who started it.)
I do not know the particulars of why this happened. He did not know either...and had asked one of the boys in a private message, but he didn't respond. Some of these kids that got involved in the games are some of the "popular" kids...and I suppose my son just got into a given game by association with someone else on the periphery.
So I'm not necessarily saying it's anyone's responsibility to allow him to keep playing, if they don't want him to play for whatever reason. But this method -- of "kicking someone out" -- and having that message displayed to my son (or whomever)....is ridiculous. It's bullying in it's basest form. Like they're on the playground at the school yard, and they won't let him play. It's completely random, and without just cause.
I have seen the effect this has had on him...and now he is reluctant to even play....for fear of being kicked off. Please don't say "well he must have been doing something wrong". He was not being abusive in any way shape or form (it's in our family room, so I hear every word).
No one is policing this. And at the very least, if the initiator of a given game can be kicked out, that's just ridiculous.
My primary gripe is the way this situation is being handled. As I said, I perceive it, it is BULLYING. And it makes me mad...that other boys...have somehow made a FUN experience for my son something that he now will only do with trepidation.
I don't imagine my son is the only victim of this. I certainly hope there is another adult or someone from Mindcraft who sees this...as I suspect the kids playing are just going to tell me to shut up.
EDIT 1/17: First, yes, I know it's MinEcraft....and secondly, I'm actually the MOM, not the father . Find it funny some people made the assumption I was the latter ....
EDIT1/18: For those of you put off by the length of this thread, let me say a few things: first and foremost, if someone took the time and interest to respond to me, I'm certainly going to take the time to respond in kind; second, consider perhaps this topic warrants a "lively" discussion; and finally, you are under no obligation to wade thru it.
EDIT 1/21: Feel like I want to amend this a bit, given a recurrence of the same sort of responses in the thread (I realize people are not going to read the whole thing necessarily). The kicking out that was done was not done by a server. It was done by kids who he knows -- fellow 12 year old 6th graders from his class. I know all the kids he was playing with, there were no older-than-12-year-olds playing. So neither his age nor his interactions with "strangers" did not play into this at all.
I feel for your sons situation, But i don't believe, for the Xbox 360, there is a legit way to boot/ban someone from their own game... Could be wrong i suppose, Haven't toyed with it.
I don't think this is going to help, But i do wish you luck. Personally, I'd have your kid stick to Single player for the time being, less stress, more fun.
i'm sorry about those boys making your son feel left out. I'd help if I could (but i'm just a girl playing the game "Minecraft"..) and I wish you and your son good luck.
If your kid didn't create the multiplayer server. The hosts or admins have the right do kick out whoever they please. I would probably kick him out of my game as well if I where hosting a server, as I don't like playing games on the internet with kids who are young and immature.
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"Every time a bat gets killed, a miner falls in a pit of lava while carrying half a stack of diamonds."
The internet can be cruel sometimes, even on a game such as Minecraft. I don't have the Xbox version, or an Xbox, so I can't exactly help your son out. However, if he's using a microphone, he may want to disable that, as some people will kick for them having an annoying voice, or being younger than them. There's unfortunately nothing you can do about it, as the kids on the server may not listen to an adult.
busygemini, you just haven't found the right server. Try something like Tschagg's Mine Resort where he can play without being bullied as long as he's a genuine player that doesn't grief others' work etc. There are plenty playing at his age that are articulate, respectful and very talented in the game. Age is no guarantee of maturity.
on the xbox, you really need to play with friends only, otherwise this stuff happens.
so your son needs to find "trusted" people over time, by joining games at random basically. Add the people who seem "good" and "nice" to his friends list, and eventually he will have 3 or 4 or more to play with.
that's how we used to do it, and yes, the guys I played with would kick out what they called the "squeaky voices", the younger kids.
you need to understand the big picture... more often than not, a younger kid is unsupervised and generally makes a beeline for the most coveted object in all of minecraft... the block of TNT. I think you can guess the rest. clearly your son is not like that, but far too many young'uns like to destroy stuff rather than build it.
when you think about it... what I just described is no different from "real life" interactions. Pick your friends carefully and wisely, and you will have fewer "bad incidents" to deal with. it can be tough for someone younger to be accepted by even a slightly older crowd. that too is just "life". best wishes.
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You don't give the exact details... if your son is being bullied by people HE put on his friend-list, tell your son to remove them and find other players to play with.
It's probably better to handle this on a more local area. If you are the parent of a son and you know your son is getting bullied in the game, speak with the bullies and/or parents of the bullies. It's quite hard to say, but: the internet, in all shapes and forms, is just rough and unforgiving. You can not expect a business that creates a game, to change the game because some people have a bad experience with it. Especially in your case, it's not important enough to be fixed.
Sharing your discontent here is of no use. This is not customer support forum... this is a community forum.
All I can do is say that I understand your discontent... but for the rest, there is not much to say, except that in my opinion, you have to protect your son from those bullies.
The Xbox uses "parties", these are groups of players. Remove the bullies from the friendlist of your son... this blocks them from sneaking into your son's online game. Now just hope your son is not going to invite them over again and rather just plays with others.
Also be sure to notify the school staff of your son to keep an eye out for him being bullied... stuff like cyberbullying is usually an extension of real bullying. Chances are that your son is shy BECAUSE he is being bullied.
It could have been a misunderstanding. Or abuse by someone else. Personally, I'd like to think it was a misunderstanding.
If it was abuse, then really you need a better server. A good server will not kick players unless they are doing something bad, they are restarting the server, or they are AFK for a long time.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Quote from Fermat »
I have discovered a truly remarkable proof of this, which this margin is too small to contain.
[;/quote]
By the way, this is a server. Mojang has no control over this. However, tell your son that it was not his fault, and that the operators in the server were being inconsiderate, if not downright self-centered.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Quote from Fermat »
I have discovered a truly remarkable proof of this, which this margin is too small to contain.
[;/quote]
I feel for your sons situation, But i don't believe, for the Xbox 360, there is a legit way to boot/ban someone from their own game... Could be wrong i suppose, Haven't toyed with it.
I don't think this is going to help, But i do wish you luck. Personally, I'd have your kid stick to Single player for the time being, less stress, more fun.
also its MinEcraft, like Mining .
Goodluck!
Thanks Karbuncle. But yes, unfortunately they can do that. At any rate, I guess what I'm getting at is...the set-up as it exists...creates an environment for bullying. The obvious answer, yes, is to let him just play as a single player....but it's bothersome that one of the more-fun options has this nefarious element. I'd think it should be more like, if you don't like/know someone, don't accept them into a game to begin with....and/or if you're not enjoying yourself, then just leave. I know, unrealistic in this day and age.
It's the internet. There is nobody to protect your kid against bullying. If you don't want him to be around it, then the answer is quite simple. Don't allow your kid to have access to the internet. Other than that there is no way around this problem. People can do whatever they please on the internet with zero consequences.
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"Every time a bat gets killed, a miner falls in a pit of lava while carrying half a stack of diamonds."
Thanks Karbuncle. But yes, unfortunately they can do that. At any rate, I guess what I'm getting at is...the set-up as it exists...creates an environment for bullying. The obvious answer, yes, is to let him just play as a single player....but it's bothersome that one of the more-fun options has this nefarious element. I'd think it should be more like, if you don't like/know someone, don't accept them into a game to begin with....and/or if you're not enjoying yourself, then just leave. I know, unrealistic in this day and age.
Nevertheless, I appreciate your comments....
The set-up for anything social involves the possibility of bullying. I recommend telling your son that the bullying does not mean anything is wrong. You can't always shield your child. Let him understand how to deal with it in his later life. For example, I was bullied when I was in school. The simple way to avoid it is to do a complete ignore of it. Teach him to do that and he may feel more confident.
i'm sorry about those boys making your son feel left out. I'd help if I could (but i'm just a girl playing the game "Minecraft"..) and I wish you and your son good luck.
Thankd PipperKitten. It's the Nature of the Beast, so to speak....but it still doesn't make it right.
The set-up for anything social involves the possibility of bullying. I recommend telling your son that the bullying does not mean anything is wrong. You can't always shield your child. Let him understand how to deal with it in his later life. For example, I was bullied when I was in school. The simple way to avoid it is to do a complete ignore of it. Teach him to do that and he may feel more confident.
This is the best response for now.
When it comes to online content, there's a reason its not rated by the ESRB. People can and will be dicks whenever they want. The idea of being anonymous gives some people a dark side to do whatever they want. If you want him to enjoy multiplayer, try joining friends games, and make sure your kid knows its not cool to take other peoples things or destroy their houses.
Really, he may be inadvertantly griefing or something along those lines if he's being booted. not really his fault as he doesn't realize it, but when it comes to playing with other people, try to make it friends at first until he's got the hang of playing with others and the 'rules' of it, then go from there. It is a fun experience playing with new people, but finding trusted servers or the such is probably the safest start... on the 360 thats a problem though.
It really does suck to have to deal with these realities, but people can and will be jerks... On the internet its pretty much considered cool to be a jackass, so most people are. Eventually they grow up, but the internet is populated by mostly immature people who think they're of supreme intelligence and anyone else is stupid and beneath them.
Sort of human nature? Either way, You can always play with him for a time, Even if you don't like the game, bonding with your kid over something he enjoys is never a bad thing... Plus it'll get him used to playing with others.
If your kid didn't create the multiplayer server. The hosts or admins have the right do kick out whoever they please. I would probably kick him out of my game as well if I where hosting a server, as I don't like playing games on the internet with kids who are young and immature.
I have no idea how old you are Grandcrafter, but I'm talking about him playing with other 12 year olds. I'm also not suggesting that everyone needs to get along with/play with everyone else. If people don't want to play with other people, I get that. My point is, the format....of KICKING PEOPLE OUT....at someone's whim....is a bit harsh. If you don't know someone, who you might not enjoy playing with, don't invite him or her to your game. And if you're not having fun, then leave.
The internet can be cruel sometimes, even on a game such as Minecraft. I don't have the Xbox version, or an Xbox, so I can't exactly help your son out. However, if he's using a microphone, he may want to disable that, as some people will kick for them having an annoying voice, or being younger than them. There's unfortunately nothing you can do about it, as the kids on the server may not listen to an adult.
Thanks for your response gojiraman. Nah, his voice is fine....and the kids are his age...so that's not the issue. But as you suggest...and as it apers, there's not much that's going to be done about the system. Sure I can suggest he not play it, etc....but it just es me off that that should need to be a recourse, ya know? Anyhow, thanks again....
busygemini, you just haven't found the right server. Try something like Tschagg's Mine Resort where he can play without being bullied as long as he's a genuine player that doesn't grief others' work etc. There are plenty playing at his age that are articulate, respectful and very talented in the game. Age is no guarantee of maturity.
Well you raise an interesting point..I don't know about the server aspect of it. But I do know that it's not the SERVER that's kicking him off, it's the individual kid(s) in the game. I appreciate your input and reminder about there being some kids out there who ARE respectful. I do suppose there's going to be a certain learning curve on the new system....
Unfotunately this is a side effect of interacting with other people. You are bound to run into a bunch of idiots. It took me a long time to find a server that I really liked with people that I liked to be "around". Of course, I am forty-four and possibly better equipped to handle the frustration and disappointment that failed attempts to find a server can cause.
Not to sound patronizing (or whatever it is I am about to sound like) but maybe you can used this as a learning experience. You could show him things like not letting others ruin your fun, not stooping to their level, not giving up, and (if you don't give up and find a good server) that there are good people out there.
I wish I could help more. If he played the PC version, I could reccommend an excellent, family friendly server where you will receive all of the respect that you deserve.
I don't see how that works really. If he was the Game Host he cannot be kicked out of his own game. As far as Im' aware the Xbox version of minecraft shares his own world (the host's world) and thus he is in charge.
Also not to be rude but, who cares if he gets kicked from a GAME. It happens to everyone and i wouldn't call it bullying its part of how the game works. Say someone joins and starts to kill other players and destroy the world. You kick them because you don't want that to happen. It is part of the game and all games have this feature. And I'm sorry but this is having an adverse effect on him why do you let him play? And for a 12 year old I think he needs to get a pair and grow up a little. Yes I was 12 once but I mean really? Needs to grow up IMO.
Gotta love it when people start a sentence with "not to be rude, but". The reason I let him play is because he enjoys it, it's another way to help him improve his social skills, and he's good at it. Sure it's a game. That doesn't mean that's a license for bullying. I do not believe your suggestion that he "grow a pair and grow up a little" is either valid or to the point. IMO.
I joined this forum to express my discontent about this subject. I do not know how to contact MINDCRAFT or their manufacturer.
Basically, we got our 12 year old son an xbox for Christmas. He has played Mindcraft online a lot and enjoys it quite a bit. He is somewhat shy socially, and I was pleased to see/hear him playing Mindcraft (he is a good player from what I've seen) with some other kids (all from the comforts of home). A couple of times in the last few days...he has been randomly "kicked out" of the games he was playing in by some of the other boys. One was in a game/party he had initiated.
I do not know the particulars of why this happened. He did not know either...and had asked one of the boys in a private message, but he didn't respond. Some of these kids that got involved in the games are some of the "popular" kids...and I suppose my son just got into a given game by association with someone else on the periphery.
So I'm not necessarily saying it's anyone's responsibility to allow him to keep playing, if they don't want him to play for whatever reason. But this method -- of "kicking someone out" -- and having that message displayed to my son (or whomever)....is ridiculous. It's bullying in it's basest form. Like they're on the playground at the school yard, and they won't let him play. It's completely random, and without just cause.
I have seen the effect this has had on him...and now he is reluctant to even play....for fear of being kicked off. Please don't say "well he must have been doing something wrong". He was not being abusive in any way shape or form (it's in our family room, so I hear every word).
No one is policing this. And at the very least, if the initiator of a given game can be kicked out, that's just ridiculous.
My primary gripe is the way this situation is being handled. As I said, I perceive it, it is BULLYING. And it makes me mad...that other boys...have somehow made a FUN experience for my son something that he now will only do with trepidation.
I don't imagine my son is the only victim of this. I certainly hope there is another adult or someone from Mindcraft who sees this...as I suspect the kids playing are just going to tell me to shut up.
Basically, we got our 12 year old son an xbox for Christmas. He has played Mindcraft online a lot and enjoys it quite a bit. He is somewhat shy socially, and I was pleased to see/hear him playing Mindcraft (he is a good player from what I've seen) with some other kids (all from the comforts of home). A couple of times in the last few days...he has been randomly "kicked out" of the games he was playing in by some of the other boys.
One was in a game/party he had initiated.(Edit 1/20: apparently not the case....he was friends with the boy who started it.)I do not know the particulars of why this happened. He did not know either...and had asked one of the boys in a private message, but he didn't respond. Some of these kids that got involved in the games are some of the "popular" kids...and I suppose my son just got into a given game by association with someone else on the periphery.
So I'm not necessarily saying it's anyone's responsibility to allow him to keep playing, if they don't want him to play for whatever reason. But this method -- of "kicking someone out" -- and having that message displayed to my son (or whomever)....is ridiculous. It's bullying in it's basest form. Like they're on the playground at the school yard, and they won't let him play. It's completely random, and without just cause.
I have seen the effect this has had on him...and now he is reluctant to even play....for fear of being kicked off. Please don't say "well he must have been doing something wrong". He was not being abusive in any way shape or form (it's in our family room, so I hear every word).
No one is policing this. And at the very least, if the initiator of a given game can be kicked out, that's just ridiculous.
My primary gripe is the way this situation is being handled. As I said, I perceive it, it is BULLYING. And it makes me mad...that other boys...have somehow made a FUN experience for my son something that he now will only do with trepidation.
I don't imagine my son is the only victim of this. I certainly hope there is another adult or someone from Mindcraft who sees this...as I suspect the kids playing are just going to tell me to shut up.
EDIT 1/17: First, yes, I know it's MinEcraft....and secondly, I'm actually the MOM, not the father . Find it funny some people made the assumption I was the latter ....
EDIT1/18: For those of you put off by the length of this thread, let me say a few things: first and foremost, if someone took the time and interest to respond to me, I'm certainly going to take the time to respond in kind; second, consider perhaps this topic warrants a "lively" discussion; and finally, you are under no obligation to wade thru it.
EDIT 1/21: Feel like I want to amend this a bit, given a recurrence of the same sort of responses in the thread (I realize people are not going to read the whole thing necessarily). The kicking out that was done was not done by a server. It was done by kids who he knows -- fellow 12 year old 6th graders from his class. I know all the kids he was playing with, there were no older-than-12-year-olds playing. So neither his age nor his interactions with "strangers" did not play into this at all.
I don't think this is going to help, But i do wish you luck. Personally, I'd have your kid stick to Single player for the time being, less stress, more fun.
also its MinEcraft, like Mining ;).
Goodluck!
"Every time a bat gets killed, a miner falls in a pit of lava while carrying half a stack of diamonds."
so your son needs to find "trusted" people over time, by joining games at random basically. Add the people who seem "good" and "nice" to his friends list, and eventually he will have 3 or 4 or more to play with.
that's how we used to do it, and yes, the guys I played with would kick out what they called the "squeaky voices", the younger kids.
you need to understand the big picture... more often than not, a younger kid is unsupervised and generally makes a beeline for the most coveted object in all of minecraft... the block of TNT. I think you can guess the rest. clearly your son is not like that, but far too many young'uns like to destroy stuff rather than build it.
when you think about it... what I just described is no different from "real life" interactions. Pick your friends carefully and wisely, and you will have fewer "bad incidents" to deal with. it can be tough for someone younger to be accepted by even a slightly older crowd. that too is just "life". best wishes.
It's probably better to handle this on a more local area. If you are the parent of a son and you know your son is getting bullied in the game, speak with the bullies and/or parents of the bullies. It's quite hard to say, but: the internet, in all shapes and forms, is just rough and unforgiving. You can not expect a business that creates a game, to change the game because some people have a bad experience with it. Especially in your case, it's not important enough to be fixed.
Sharing your discontent here is of no use. This is not customer support forum... this is a community forum.
All I can do is say that I understand your discontent... but for the rest, there is not much to say, except that in my opinion, you have to protect your son from those bullies.
The Xbox uses "parties", these are groups of players. Remove the bullies from the friendlist of your son... this blocks them from sneaking into your son's online game. Now just hope your son is not going to invite them over again and rather just plays with others.
Also be sure to notify the school staff of your son to keep an eye out for him being bullied... stuff like cyberbullying is usually an extension of real bullying. Chances are that your son is shy BECAUSE he is being bullied.
It could have been a misunderstanding. Or abuse by someone else. Personally, I'd like to think it was a misunderstanding.
If it was abuse, then really you need a better server. A good server will not kick players unless they are doing something bad, they are restarting the server, or they are AFK for a long time.
Thanks Karbuncle. But yes, unfortunately they can do that. At any rate, I guess what I'm getting at is...the set-up as it exists...creates an environment for bullying. The obvious answer, yes, is to let him just play as a single player....but it's bothersome that one of the more-fun options has this nefarious element. I'd think it should be more like, if you don't like/know someone, don't accept them into a game to begin with....and/or if you're not enjoying yourself, then just leave. I know, unrealistic in this day and age.
Nevertheless, I appreciate your comments....
"Every time a bat gets killed, a miner falls in a pit of lava while carrying half a stack of diamonds."
The set-up for anything social involves the possibility of bullying. I recommend telling your son that the bullying does not mean anything is wrong. You can't always shield your child. Let him understand how to deal with it in his later life. For example, I was bullied when I was in school. The simple way to avoid it is to do a complete ignore of it. Teach him to do that and he may feel more confident.
Thankd PipperKitten. It's the Nature of the Beast, so to speak....but it still doesn't make it right.
This is the best response for now.
When it comes to online content, there's a reason its not rated by the ESRB. People can and will be dicks whenever they want. The idea of being anonymous gives some people a dark side to do whatever they want. If you want him to enjoy multiplayer, try joining friends games, and make sure your kid knows its not cool to take other peoples things or destroy their houses.
Really, he may be inadvertantly griefing or something along those lines if he's being booted. not really his fault as he doesn't realize it, but when it comes to playing with other people, try to make it friends at first until he's got the hang of playing with others and the 'rules' of it, then go from there. It is a fun experience playing with new people, but finding trusted servers or the such is probably the safest start... on the 360 thats a problem though.
It really does suck to have to deal with these realities, but people can and will be jerks... On the internet its pretty much considered cool to be a jackass, so most people are. Eventually they grow up, but the internet is populated by mostly immature people who think they're of supreme intelligence and anyone else is stupid and beneath them.
Sort of human nature? Either way, You can always play with him for a time, Even if you don't like the game, bonding with your kid over something he enjoys is never a bad thing... Plus it'll get him used to playing with others.
I have no idea how old you are Grandcrafter, but I'm talking about him playing with other 12 year olds. I'm also not suggesting that everyone needs to get along with/play with everyone else. If people don't want to play with other people, I get that. My point is, the format....of KICKING PEOPLE OUT....at someone's whim....is a bit harsh. If you don't know someone, who you might not enjoy playing with, don't invite him or her to your game. And if you're not having fun, then leave.
Thanks for your response gojiraman. Nah, his voice is fine....and the kids are his age...so that's not the issue. But as you suggest...and as it apers, there's not much that's going to be done about the system. Sure I can suggest he not play it, etc....but it just es me off that that should need to be a recourse, ya know? Anyhow, thanks again....
Well you raise an interesting point..I don't know about the server aspect of it. But I do know that it's not the SERVER that's kicking him off, it's the individual kid(s) in the game. I appreciate your input and reminder about there being some kids out there who ARE respectful. I do suppose there's going to be a certain learning curve on the new system....
Thanks again.
Not to sound patronizing (or whatever it is I am about to sound like) but maybe you can used this as a learning experience. You could show him things like not letting others ruin your fun, not stooping to their level, not giving up, and (if you don't give up and find a good server) that there are good people out there.
I wish I could help more. If he played the PC version, I could reccommend an excellent, family friendly server where you will receive all of the respect that you deserve.
Gotta love it when people start a sentence with "not to be rude, but". The reason I let him play is because he enjoys it, it's another way to help him improve his social skills, and he's good at it. Sure it's a game. That doesn't mean that's a license for bullying. I do not believe your suggestion that he "grow a pair and grow up a little" is either valid or to the point. IMO.
Thats the Xbox Live community for you..