So I've been thinking of creating an adventure map, it seems fun to both make and play adventure maps. But with most maps, there should be a decent storyline. The problem is that I'm not a good storyweaver, so I'm not sure if my 'storyline' is good or not.
That's why I'm showing my 'draft' to you people so you can point out the problems and criticism, making this better.
So here it is (Though I am sure you'll TL'DR sadly):
You are Steve, an inhabitant in an isolated (not named) village. Your village has been working hard and after much failures of earning income, the village grew in debt and the mayor eventually had to sell his village to a city. Though, only the mayor knows that the village is sold, so when the mayor announces that everyone will move into another town, unaware of the fact that they are being sold off to another colony, becomes excited and dreams of their new prospering future. This includes Steve.
The map starts when the people of the city comes and sets up a tent to transport the villagers to the city. Many people are excited and most of the villagers left already to the city.
After wandering around the town for a bit you go to the tent too, and head to the city. You think the city is just another industrialized place, full of business. What you don't realize is that the city is a military based one, and people are heading to become recruits for their city.
But obviously since most people don't want the rest of their lives in military, the city knows people will try to defy run away when they realize it's a military based one. So what do they do to keep the villagers until it's too late? Setup a decoy city, a fake one, to trick the people into thinking that the fake city is in fact the real one.
And so Steve gets transported to the fake city, and he gets to interact with the city. Citizens act rather unnatural as if they rehearsed it before, and the city itself is a bit empty. It seems a bit weird but the villagers shrug it off, and when they are done with the tour of the city, they go back to the train station for a 'feast'. When they take a minecart ride to get to the 'feast', they get into a trap, and go into a mysterious room.
With the villagers trapped, the mayor of the city is safe to say that the city isn't business and money, but instead is a military to conquer neighboring towns, and people are now recruits. This wasn't what the villagers wanted, shock and confusion fills among them. But no matter, they are chucked into the worst of living conditions, of the lowest ranks of recruits. People mourn and cry and anger about it, but eventually night passes and it's day 2 of the city.
The villagers are run through a series of tests (The Strengh Course, Intelligence Course, and Dexterity Course). Each course has 9 tests, 3 different types of test with 3 varying difficulties.
The Strength is the ability to control your combat skills and weaponry. You are given the task to master the ways of: Warrior (Sword), Archer (Bow), and Pyro (Fire).
The Intelligence is the ability to have common sense and frankly, intelligence. There will be a series of quizzes, redstone (yes these in adventure maps are annoying as hell so I'm thinking what to change it with), and brain teasers on how to kill animals in different ways.
The Dexterity is the ability to act fast and move fast. These are parkour, monster/TNT/sand runs, and.. I'm not sure about the last one.
After tests, there will be a bed to save your spawn, and occasional diary entries by Asura, a scrollmaker that disappeared a few weeks ago in the village.
It turns out that Asura did find out that the mayor sold them, and decides to investigate the city, but is captured and eventually executed as accusations of being a spy.
You learn why you are here and what happened, thanks to the diary entries.
Many of the villagers die in the process but you manage to survive them with flawless skills, and your ranks improve until you are one of the best recruits. But even then, life is very crappy. Although your environment is better because of your increased rank, this is DEFINETELY not the life you have wanted to live. You know that sometime, you will have to escape.
When your 27 tests are over, you are given one more test: the test to promote your rank into not recruit, but an actual member. At this point, you seem to think that there is no means to escape, because once you join, you can't ever leave. But you find a scrap of paper on the room just before the 28th test, a letter by Asura, surprisingly. According to the letter he is alive and the execution part was a lie, but in here has a more important piece of information: there is a loose part of the ceiling of the test where it leads to the ventilation system, which Asura says will very likely allow escape, which he will try. When you go to the 28th test (don't worry, the test is impossible so you must escape : P), sure enough, there is a ventilation hatch on the ceiling, which can be used to get out of the course and into the air vent. Though, there are a number of problems. One, this system is a complete maze and is quite dark. What's more is that the alarms ring for jailbreak, and guards pour from every direction, trying to get to you. It's a race against time (and them) to get out of the air vent.
You soon get out of the air vent, and go through a few more 'behind the scenes' part of the military systems, such as the sewer, and an abandoned minecart, which you find Asura hiding and soon join to escape. After the minecart station, and some tips from Asura to get to the right place, you do find the exit.
"Just what do you think you're doing?"
The mayor of the city said.
You expect to find anger in his eyes, but instead, you find pity.
The mayor did think that there was great potential in you, and with you, the city would have prospered even more than ever. It would be a life of luxury. He pleads to reconsider your actions and join them.
You feel pity for the man. After all, it was just his job...
But Asura disagrees. He wants to escape. After all the planning and all the effort went into outrunning the guards and getting here. But he just shakes his head and says that he'll go where you want to go.
So, the question. Will you join as the member of the city, or will you escape?
The story branches off depending on your decision.
BECOMING A MEMBER
This is path 1, where you do decide to join and become a member. The mayor comforts you and says you'll have a better life as you head back. Normally people would get severely punished but as a valuable member they decide to give you one more chance.
When they go back to the camp, they decide to have a talk with you. They state that the city is a military, and their goal is to conquer other villages, but they have another goal: To obtain the blocks of the 4 elements: Iron, Gold, Diamond, and Lapis. They are not for valuable price, as most people think, however. These 4 blocks have a special characteristic of power, and when the four are combined, they create such a force that can be used to power project Hermes, which is a (flying) ship that can aid to conquer. And after calculations, with the age and power and intelligence and dexterity, it has been decided that you will be the one to collect the first of the four.
The first one is actually close; it's in the safe of the city, but it's been stored in the mine and nobody has gone there for a long time since the mine has been abandoned. It's not really cursed or evil; it's just that it's been so long it must have been hidden, and everyone does not remember the exact location of the mine. Though one person says there was an abandoned factory a few 100 meters off the city; abandoned approximately the same time as the mine. You go investigate.
The factory turns out to be a pork factory, but since the mechanisms has long been rusted, the pigs are handled and thrown about as alive pigs. The factory reactor core is at the top of the factory; turning it on will cause it to malfunction and blow up. This however seems to reveal a minecart station to the mine. When going in the mine, you can clearly see the safe; however, it is locked until you collect 9 of the hidden (not completely hidden, just hard to find from the blind eye) slime balls, which will allow the safe to open and get your Iron Block of Defense. Opening the safe was a trap; a defense mechanism, you fall to the criminal's room, with cells. One cell has a button which can be used to get out, but it won't be easy getting to the surface. Once out the factory will explode.
When you return, your rank will increase yet again, and you will head to Hermes (the flying ship) and plug in the Iron Block of Defense.
And you are given some free time to do whatever you wish at will, coming back when ready.
When you go out, however, Asura comes, and says something's been bugging him. Because it was unfair to the both of us that we're doing just fine, but we left the villagers, who are still doing the tests and suffering. Asura suggests to go save the villagers in the free time. So you go to the training facility. However the training facility is heavily guarded, so you go through the backdoor; through the sewer. When the villagers are not found in the testing area, you delve deeper into the training facility, where you eventually find a key, saying 'For Use of Jail'. Head to the jail, and you will find the villagers trapped in there, planned for execution. You let them all free, and someone, as a meaning of thanks, gives you a small pendant of a glittering blue gem (called a diamond).
When coming back, the mayor says to see the pendant, and states that it is part of the Diamond Block of Magic. He demands you to find the place where he has gotten, and find the remaining part, whether it means to simply go into a room, or demolishing the town. The problem is that you know the person found that in the village. The village you lived. There was a chance you could destroy your own hometown, which shocks you. But since defying meant death, you have no choice but to head to your village. At the village, you burn everything down as ordered, and find the diamond. But upon obtaining it, it detonates TNT, entirely blowing up the land itself. Sadness, but you head back anyway.
This is not done yet.
TL;DR: Tricking to go to city that you'll be better there, you go to military city, and you train. When you finish all you decide to escape, where you meet Asura. When you're on the verge of escape a dilemma happens: Escape or join? They're not that bad.
If you join, you go through several missions obtaining Iron Block of Defense, Gold Block of Power, Diamond Block of Magic.
This isn't done yet. And extreme compression -> crappy, undetailed, confusing writing.
The story is not done yet. I have ideas but I ran out of time to write all this. So I'll add on when I have more time.
Also note that since this is checkpoint based, you have to make backups of your saves and replace them when you die.. inconvenient but with the TNT detonated and the place becoming debris, I really need to have it.
If people enjoy this story, or if it is fixed enough, who knows, I might be able to really make a map out of this. :smile.gif:
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
wow...long read :biggrin.gif:
It's a nice story, and I would enjoy a custom map like this. This is one of those maps where you can make choices and that could possibly affect the end of the map and story. I would say it needs little improvement and you should start work on your map. I would play it, and I'm actually looking forward to it, it's rare to find a custom map with a good story, it's usually some village with a curse, or some platforming map. Good luck and hope this gets done soon!
Should have posted this on summer, school starts in a few days :tongue.gif:
I should also note that I'm not the type of person who builds gigantic awesome structues like the Redmurk Mystery's castle. That castle was just simply amazing.
Thank you for the input though. Good to hear it's going along well. I have plotted out Act 2 but Act 3 seems to be way too short compared to 1 and 2. Have to think about it for a bit.
And also, I wonder if I should make it 6 instead of 9 in each course. Because 1, I can't think of enough ideas, and 2, 27 levels would be really tedious.
Maybe for Strength there should be 2 difficulties for each weapon, and 3 difficulties for the other 2 courses because I can only think of 2 ideas for each course.