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[alexdafishguy]

busygemini, on 17 January 2013 - 03:11 AM, said:

Hi,

Yes he does, and that's how it started out, innocently enough.  It was when some of the other kids other friends joined in that the kicking out happened.  He has since played with the intial group of kids, and if and when those other kids join in again, he'll have to decide whether to stay or leave.  Thanks for your input.



I don't quite understand your question....so can't decide if it's mean or not ...

im saying that they might just not want to play with him(assuming its like a group invite for xbox)

[Craft4325]

Those sound like griefers where they the same account each time? p.s I am very sorry for those people being jerks to your son.

[Craft4325]

Akraen, on 15 January 2013 - 11:08 PM, said:

I don't see how that works really. If he was the Game Host he cannot be kicked out of his own game. As far as Im' aware the Xbox version of minecraft shares his own world (the host's world) and thus he is in charge.
Also not to be rude but, who cares if he gets kicked from a GAME. It happens to everyone and i wouldn't call it bullying its part of how the game works. Say someone joins and starts to kill other players and destroy the world. You kick them because you don't want that to happen. It is part of the game and all games have this feature. And I'm sorry but this is having an adverse effect on him why do you let him play? And for a 12 year old I think he needs to get a pair and grow up a little. Yes I was 12 once but I mean really? Needs to grow up IMO.

Wow a little harsh don't you think

[lightbulbwindows1000]

Some servers have a rule where 13+ people are allowed on it for a fair reason, but that was usually classic, and they are saying false information to players. The rule is to prevent harassment to the other kids, but if they're making the message unprofessional like this:

 Logged off of server
kicked for not being 13+ How stupid 

Then that's not fair AT ALL. But if it says something like this:

 Logged off of server
kicked for not being 13+ Sorry, it's to prevent harassment. 

Then I find that fair. But the servers have their own operators and the operator has his or her decision, whether to be a total idiot with their rules and have ridiculous rules like this:

 Do not stare at the owner or ban. MCBans is on! 

There are a whole bunch of fair servers on the PC version, and they only have game related rules like this:

 No griefing! 

I've never seen a 13+ rule on PC version except for classic.

[Got2Survive]

busygemini, on 16 January 2013 - 12:06 AM, said:

Thanks Karbuncle.  But yes, unfortunately they can do that.  At any rate, I guess what I'm getting at is...the set-up as it exists...creates an environment for bullying.  The obvious answer, yes, is to let him just play as a single player....but it's bothersome that one of the more-fun options has this nefarious element.  I'd think it should be more like, if you don't like/know someone, don't accept them into a game to begin with....and/or if you're not enjoying yourself, then just leave.  I know, unrealistic in this day and age.

Nevertheless, I appreciate your comments....

I also feel for your situation. Try playing with your son on the Xbox, just you and him playing Minecraft. I'm not sure if you can do it, since I only have the PC version, but a father-son interaction, especially in a videogame, is a unique and wonderful experience, for father and son. It will let you find out what you do in the game, if you feel the game is inappropriate, slang and phrases that comes from the game, and generally let you know how your son is feeling when he gets frustrated or disappointed with the game. Playing a videogame with your son will also create a safe play environment for them, it will make him feel sure that no matter what happens in the game, that you're always there for him, and many more things. I could go on, but I'm sure that you and many other know of the incredible benefits of father to son interactions, especially in videogames. I could not state how awesome it is to play games with you son.

Have a great day!

[WildCreeper]

Was him playing with "close" people (friends, or other kids from his school, etc.)?
Or was him playing with random people on the internet?

If he's playing with "close" people, maybe it can be bullying (but maybe it's not)

If he's playing with random people, then there is nothing you can do. Once I started playing an online game, I joined a room, and got kicked for no apparent reason.

[busygemini]

RebD, on 17 January 2013 - 04:30 AM, said:

I can understand that. I was just annoyed that you were blaming it all on the kick function. It is reasonable to want your kid to be able to enjoy his hobby and share it with like minded people.



I think by "playground scenario" you mean the bit where I said that just because a group of kids doesn't want to play with another kid, doesn't make it bullying? I'm only asking because i'm not entirely sure what you mean. If you disagree with what I said, that's your right. And you're probably right about it not being worth an argument, so I guess we'll just have to disagree on that point.



Yeah I think that's sensible, you're going to find it far easier to find people your son can play with than you are changing the attitudes of the entire player base and changing how servers operate.

I'm glad you understand why the kick function exists now. That's the only thing I had a problem with. Mojang didn't add it to foster bullying, they added it to prevent people from ruining other peoples fun, It was implemented with the best of intentions, i'm sure.

I stand by what I said in my original post, but I do think I could have worded it in a much friendlier manner. So I would just like to say, thank you for disagreeing with me in a mature manner and replying to my post with a friendly demeanor. I wish you and your son the best of luck finding a server that he can enjoy.

Thanks for taking the time to respond again...and for your kind words.  Yup, it's easier to be nice than not...Have a good night.

CrazyAL, on 17 January 2013 - 06:44 AM, said:

This thread should be made into a documentary.

You got a laugh out of me on that one ...

[iFranco23]

If the kids are all the same age then you can understand how something bad could come of this. People argue, and forget it when kids argue over the Xbox, a war is bound to happen. You should hear the stuff that comes out of their mouth's. But anyways, kids will be kids. This is the same thing that happens in schools all throughout the world (as you pointed out). The host cannot be booted on Xbox, they could have booted him for a number of reasons. So your child might have been in a game doing something that they didn't want to happen, and a boot ensued.  Xbox is not suitable for everyone, to be honest your son's best bet is to play with real life friends that he knows, or by himself. Depending on the video games he plays, he will experience A LOT more bullying on different games.

Kicking people out of the game is necessary, like if someone is destroying your stuff. If they didn't want to play with him, they can just boot him and move on. No one needs to explain, like the ratings say "Ratings change for online play".

Remember if they are "teenagers" they will act the part. Bullying is quite consistent in this age group, even if it's online.

Tell your son not to sweat it and move on (early life lesson)

[busygemini]

Goldcap, on 17 January 2013 - 10:45 PM, said:

Well, as most of the comments are saying "Lol stupid troll" or "Get PC edition Xbox sucks" I will tell you one thing. They are both right. Lol stupid troll, I do not know your son, but i am sure that unless you and your wife are both trolls, at most he could only be part troll. From the sincerity of your post however, we are forced to believe that if he has any troll blood in him what so ever then it is from your wife. I would also like to say that Xbox does not suck, but PC is better for minecraft. I would look into minecraft Pc for your son, and give your wife the nickname of "Possible troll." Good luck
[sorry if this sounds mean, i am in perfect agreeance. Multiple times i have been banned by my friends and multiple times i have felt bullied. However this is the greatest game, and some of the people are dicks without dicks;)]

Well, I'm not entirely sure how to respond to your post.  How about I start by correcting your assumption that I'm the DAD -- I'm the MOM.  As for your troll litany, frankly I found it pretty entertaining because it's based on another assumption...and you know what they say about assuming.

Anyway, sorry you've had similar experiences.  The fact that you admitted to feeling bullied actually made me feel better for starting this discussion to begin with.  But as you also suggest, I suspect that over time the pros will outweigh the cons...so we'll see how it goes...

alexdafishguy, on 17 January 2013 - 10:49 PM, said:

im saying that they might just not want to play with him(assuming its like a group invite for xbox)

lol I got that part..but you said something about if they were playing a different game?  I get that people don't necessarily want to play with everyone else...I just don't like the mid-game kicking, when you're not doing anything wrong....

Thanks for coming back to check on that...

[Barlycorn]

DewmD66, on 17 January 2013 - 12:46 AM, said:

...I'm sorry...but at the same time, cry me a river. its a dog eat dog world. And the internet is one place where you can't hide behind your participation trophy or your political correctness.

But you can act like a jerk and hide behind the anonymity of the web.

[busygemini]

Craft4325, on 17 January 2013 - 10:53 PM, said:

Those sound like griefers where they the same account each time? p.s I am very sorry for those people being jerks to your son.

Appreciate your thoughts...

Craft4325, on 17 January 2013 - 11:01 PM, said:

Wow a little harsh don't you think

Glad it wasn't just me who thought so....

lightbulbwindows1000, on 17 January 2013 - 11:10 PM, said:

Some servers have a rule where 13+ people are allowed on it for a fair reason, but that was usually classic, and they are saying false information to players. The rule is to prevent harassment to the other kids, but if they're making the message unprofessional like this:

 Logged off of server
kicked for not being 13+ How stupid 

Then that's not fair AT ALL. But if it says something like this:

 Logged off of server
kicked for not being 13+ Sorry, it's to prevent harassment. 

Then I find that fair. But the servers have their own operators and the operator has his or her decision, whether to be a total idiot with their rules and have ridiculous rules like this:

 Do not stare at the owner or ban. MCBans is on! 

There are a whole bunch of fair servers on the PC version, and they only have game related rules like this:

 No griefing! 

I've never seen a 13+ rule on PC version except for classic.

Huh, some interesting points.  And I get the distinctions you raise.  They don't really apply in this case though, as it's the other kids...not the servers (or those assigned by servers with special rights)...who were doing the kicking out. The notification would be something along the lines of "you have been kicked out by one of the players in this game". Plus all the kids are his classmates, 11 and 12 year olds...

Thanks though, I appreciate your information.

[busygemini]

Got2Survive, on 17 January 2013 - 11:19 PM, said:

I also feel for your situation. Try playing with your son on the Xbox, just you and him playing Minecraft. I'm not sure if you can do it, since I only have the PC version, but a father-son interaction, especially in a videogame, is a unique and wonderful experience, for father and son. It will let you find out what you do in the game, if you feel the game is inappropriate, slang and phrases that comes from the game, and generally let you know how your son is feeling when he gets frustrated or disappointed with the game. Playing a videogame with your son will also create a safe play environment for them, it will make him feel sure that no matter what happens in the game, that you're always there for him, and many more things. I could go on, but I'm sure that you and many other know of the incredible benefits of father to son interactions, especially in videogames. I could not state how awesome it is to play games with you son.

Have a great day!

Hi there,

First, thanks so much for your compassion about this situation.  I really struggled with it before deciding to look for some place to vent about it...and for the most part, everyone's been helpul and supportive.

Secondly, while I completely appreciate your suggestions for father-son time on Xbox...I'm actually the MOM .  Nevertheless, he does do a lot of this stuff with his dad, and will continue to do so as we navigate this new system.  He and I play cards ....

Thanks though!

[0strichGuy11]

Could just be his friends being mean or something. They could be getting full of themselves and trying to impress others by the power of kicking. Thats how my friends are, thats why I switched to PC. For some reason, some kids my age thinks its cool to have online friends and ditch real life friends.

[MartyLoup]

I love how this whole topic is basically "this is what parents actually believe" in a nutshell

[Mathy]

What is interesting is this is the problem with most online communities.

[EinzigerAI]

It's 2013 how are parents still surprised stuff like this happens on the internet?

[MICHAEL_BAY]

Online communities aren't usually very child-friendly. Your son should only play with people he knows or simply accept that some people dislike young players or are generally idiotic.

[SunnySoulSheep]

Hi I'll add my two cents worth. I don't know anything about how the x-box minecraft servers work. I do know how PC versions work and even then it takes some time to find a server that is the right "fit" for you. I do know that in the pc servers there are a few kid/family friendly ones out there and the staff are on top of things and the power to kick- mute-ban are not given to just anyone. It took me and my son a fair amount of looking but we found one a little over a year ago and are still there.

PS I'm a mom too.

[Lillojohn]

It doesn't have to be bullying. It could be that it was just a random kick and that he can reconnect to the server again. Or there was a particular glitch or bug that your son has exploited.

[Exo000]

This can happen and you should find some nice friendly servers,not childish servers with 12 year old admins who think they have the right to kick and ban players,without thinking twice about how it'll really hurt the victim player.

And imo you should get used to it,it's part of the internet,i once got bullied too by an european on an mmorpg,it's 2 years ago because i wasn't that good in english i got pwned hard and almost rage quitted,but finally rage quitted after finding my stuffs were all gone for no reason,i think my neighbor peeked when i was typing my password.

And im still trying to find out who was that bullying european guy,no avail :/