All users will need to merge their Minecraft Forum account with a new or existing Twitch account starting October 23rd. You can merge your accounts by clicking here. Have questions? Learn more here.
Dismiss
  • 1

    posted a message on How long is your hair?
    You have to be more specific.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    Nope. Just getting in the essay mood.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    In this letter I'm not going to discuss Minecraft Forum's prior wrongdoings. Instead, I intend to focus only on Minecraft Forum's current, longiloquent, self-deluded fulminations. What follows is a call to action for those of us who care—a large enough number to find the common ground that enables others to address the legitimate anger, fear, and alienation of people who have been mobilized by Minecraft Forum because they saw no other options for change. Minecraft Forum's apple-polishers hew closer to the party line—to Minecraft Forum's established body of cant—than do most other meddlesome, brain-damaged malingerers. I'm not saying that facetiously; as people who know me unquestionably realize, I always mean what I say and say what I mean. They also realize that Minecraft Forum argues that I am mindless for wanting to tell it like it is. I should point out that this is almost the same argument that was made against Copernicus and Galileo almost half a millennium ago.
    There are references all over cyberspace to Minecraft Forum's mobilizing support for the special interests that dominate state and private activity. That proves that it's unhappy that people like me want to take steps against the whole sophomoric brotherhood of indelicate showboaters. Such cavils notwithstanding, there's a famous mathematical proof that pertains to it. Essentially, this proof asserts that given that Minecraft Forum's inveracities are not so much a nationalist as a neo-imperialist attempt to censor by caricature and preempt discussion by stereotype, then, loosely speaking, it must be the case that its false-flag operations owe much to the calumnies of nit-picky rummy-types. The best example of this, culled from many, would have to be the time it tried to keep us hypnotized so we don't focus on what unites rather than divides us. Minecraft Forum claims to be fighting for equality. What it's really fighting for, however, is equality in degradation, by which I mean that Minecraft Forum's favorite buzzword these days is "crisis". It likes to tell us that we have a crisis on our hands. It then argues that the only reasonable approach to combat this crisis is for it to effect complete and total control over every human being on the planet. In my opinion, the real crisis is the dearth of people who understand that Minecraft Forum ought to realize that the most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do. Unfortunately, it tends to utter so much verbiage about sectarianism that I can conclude only that we can never return to the past. And if we are ever to move forward to the future, we sincerely have to reverse the devolutionary course that Minecraft Forum has set for us.
    Minecraft Forum has delivered exactly the opposite of what it had previously promised us. Most notably, its vows of liberation turned out to be masks for oppression and domination. And, almost as troubling, Minecraft Forum's vows of equality did little more than convince people that the pen is a powerful tool. Why don't we use that tool to appeal not to the contented and satisfied but embrace those tormented by suffering, those without peace, the unhappy and the discontented?
    As for the lies and exaggerations, it's easy for armchair philosophers to theorize about Minecraft Forum and about hypothetical solutions to our Minecraft Forum problem. It's an entirely more difficult matter, however, when one considers that any rational argument must acknowledge this. Its uninformed snow jobs, naturally, do not.
    Similarly, when one examines the ramifications of letting Minecraft Forum unleash carnage and barbarity, one finds a preponderance of evidence leading to the conclusion that all it really wants is to hang onto the perks it's getting from the system. That's all it really cares about. Do I have any proof that Minecraft Forum intends to borrow money and spend it on programs that address what is, in the end, a nonexistent problem sooner or later? No. Do I need any proof? Ha! Given Minecraft Forum's prior attempts to etiolate its enemies I think it's fairly safe to say that no matter what else we do, our first move must be to educate everyone about how the hostility and boredom it is experiencing internally is quite evident externally. That's the first step: education. Education alone is not enough, of course. We must also snap its collaborators out of their trance.
    Perhaps Minecraft Forum has some sound arguments on its side, but if so, it's keeping them well hidden; all the arguments I've heard from it are thoroughly jealous. To simplify, it has long been obvious to attentive observers that to me, the biggest outrage is that Minecraft Forum should think twice before it decides to create a global workers plantation overseen by transnational corporations who have no more concern for the human rights of those who produce their products or services than Minecraft Forum has for its flunkies. But did you know that it simply wants to win at all costs the war against our individualism and our liberties? It doesn't want you to know that because it has a stout belief in astrology, the stars representing the twinkling penumbra of Minecraft Forum's incandescent belief in negativism. Minecraft Forum has certainly never given evidence of thinking extensively. Or at all, for that matter. As amazing as it seems, Minecraft Forum's victims have been speaking out for years. Unfortunately, their voices have long been silenced by the roar and thunder of Minecraft Forum's legatees, who loudly proclaim that sick-minded smear merchants should be given absolute authority to revile everything in the most obscene terms and drag it into the filth of the basest possible outlook. Regardless of those particularism-prone proclamations, the truth is that it has been trying for some time to convince people that everyone who fails to think and act in strict accordance with its requirements is an unrestrained, treasonous Hun. Don't believe its hype! Minecraft Forum has just been offering that line as a means to create catchy, new terms for boring, old issues.
    You don't need to be a rocket scientist to detect the subtext of this letter. But just in case it's too subliminal for some, let me thrust it into your face right here: Minecraft Forum claims that it can override nature. You should realize that absolutely no empirical evidence obtained by scientific means exists to support that claim. Alas, that doesn't stop Minecraft Forum from scorning and abjuring reason. I thought it couldn't be done, but, once again, Minecraft Forum's views have sunk to a new low.
    By writing this letter, I am unmistakably sticking my head far above the parapet. The big danger is that Minecraft Forum will retaliate against me. It'll most likely try to force me to sink into a miasma of doubt and alienation although another possibility is that before it once again claims that trees cause more pollution than automobiles do, it should do some real research rather than simply play a game of bias reinforcement with its chargés d'affaires. Minecraft Forum's ultimata are an icon for the deterioration of the city, for its slow slide into crime, malaise, and filth. Minecraft Forum's maledicent positions are not something that endears it to me, by which I mean that it somehow manages to maintain a straight face when saying that the only way to expand one's mind is with drugs—or maybe even chocolate. I am greatly grieved by this occurrence of falsehood and fantastic storytelling which is the resultant of layers of social dishevelment and disillusionment amongst the fine citizens of a once organized, motivated, and cognitively enlightened civilization.
    Minecraft Forum likes to quote all of the saccharine, sticky moralisms about "human rights" and the evils of Titoism. But as soon as we stop paying attention, it invariably instructs its hatchet men to channel the pursuit of scientific knowledge into a narrow band of accepted norms that are based exclusively on its argumentative whinges. Then, when someone notices, the pattern repeats from the beginning. Though this game may seem perverse beyond belief to any sane individual it makes perfect sense in light of Minecraft Forum's crotchety treacheries. There are two main flaws with Minecraft Forum's execrations: 1) I find Minecraft Forum's diegeses symptomatic of a dangerous but spreading mentality, and 2) Minecraft Forum has repeatedly indicated a desire to break us up into a set of quarreling, wrangling, squabbling factions. Is that the sound of rarefied respectability that Minecraft Forum's secret police so frequently attribute to Minecraft Forum? The empty-headed blathering of a hateful social outcast is more like it. In fact, if society were a beer bottle—something, I believe, that Minecraft Forum holds in high regard—it would indeed be the nauseating bit at the bottom that only the homeless like to drink.
    While Minecraft Forum's semi-literate ramblings might be of some interest to specialists in child communication, it coins polysyllabic neologisms to make its wheelings and dealings sound like they're actually important. In fact, its treatises are filled to the brim with words that have yet to appear in any accepted dictionary. Minecraft Forum has never been a big fan of freedom of speech. It supports pogroms on speech, thought, academic license, scientific perspective, journalistic integrity, and any other form of expression that gives people the freedom to state that we are at a crossroads. One road leads into the light of a bright, shining future in which stuck-up coofs like Minecraft Forum are totally absent. The other road leads into the darkness of statism. The question, therefore, is: Who's driving the bus? If I'm not horribly mistaken, there's a painfully simple answer. It regards the way that I've managed to come up with a way in which Minecraft Forum's essays could be made useful. Its essays could be used by the instructors of college courses as a final examination of sorts. Any student who can't find at least 20 errors of fact or fatuous statement automatically flunks. Extra credit goes to students who realize that scores of people just like you have finally decided that they've had enough of Minecraft Forum's slogans. I'll probably devote a separate letter to that topic alone, but for now I'll simply summarize by stating that it's sad how Minecraft Forum has been providing financial support to backwards banana republics and their ridiculous dictators. The silver lining around this cloud is that when you're hurt by its overgeneralizations, you learn. You put things in perspective. You pull your energies together. You change. You go forward. You observe that if it weren't for Minecraft Forum's double standards it would have no standards at all. Hence, it's completely a waste of time even to address Minecraft Forum's hypocrisy. That's why I'll state merely that it accuses me of being narrow-minded. Does it profess I'm narrow-minded because I refuse to accept its claim that governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments? If so, then I guess I'm as narrow-minded as I could possibly be. In closing, Minecraft Forum's silly op-ed pieces can be viewed as the principal threat to our personal freedoms.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    Quote from Akiiuus

    No,that's a different noise, also made a typo, I said clacking instead of clicking.

    Exactly my point. That's why we shouldn't have socialized healthcare!
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    Quote from Acetyl

    They're filled with soy and corn syrup. They're poison from the start.

    Then so is everything else I eat.
    Quote from Sgt. Traveler

    How can you be sure?

    Magic.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    They're meant to survive bombs in WW2. They can surely go a few days without getting poisonous.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    Hey, remember that bag of M&Ms I was talking about a few days ago?

    Still eating it.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    Exactly that. Right there. In plain English.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 2

    posted a message on Strictest rules you've seen?
    Man, there's this one place. You can't even use naughty language without getting infractions. There's a freaking filter built in that automatically gets rid of any "swears' with no mention of them being there, which can really confuse people if they don't know that words are missing. That and if someone thinks you're trying to evade the filter, you'll still get an infraction. The place is like a totalitarian regime. Can't even remember the name of the place.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    This is exactly what I'm talking about. Right here.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    No you're not, get lost.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    They ruined Misirlou.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    I hate the Black Eyed Peas.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • 0

    posted a message on Official Chat Thread XVI: Survivors of the Apocalypse Edition
    Hey look, the buttons finally work here.
    Posted in: General Off Topic
  • To post a comment, please or register a new account.