Prolouge/Day 0
Alright, so after awhile of exploring this strange world, I felt like I'd done everything. But one day, on my main save file, their were 3 spiders hanging around the small glass observatory I had in my crafting room, inside my Inner-Fort. But I saw a Pig with them! He was being pushed about by them, right on top of the glass. That is, at least, until they turned their wicked heads over to me....I broke the glass of my observatory and jumped out, challenging all 3 at once. I had sustained quite a bit of damage, and I remember that their was a Pig with the gang of spiders. So I turned to this Pig, and was about to raise my sword and decapitate the poor fellow so I could.... Eat him. And replenish lost limbs.
Anyways, I looked over at him. He looked up, and oinked, as if saying 'Thanks!' But I think he MAY have taken it the wrong way, because he jumped through the crack in my observatory and proceeded to jump on everything inside of it. He had a particular interest in the storage chest, and I had to lure him out by making a small opening in my wall. After successfully luring him out, I decided I'd just sleep on it.
So basically, this is going to be my diary. Everything in here is a true account, as I explore more about the behavior of this pig and what he does, and what changes as time goes by. This is going to be a story for the audience, and a fun adventure for me.
Day 1, Noon, Sunny, No Clouds in sight
So I decided to keep this pig, I had spare cooked ham in my chest anyways. I'll keep this diary to see what happens as our bond develops.
So, today, I tried getting him outside. Either he has ADD or a fear of doors, because every time I'd get him close to the door he'd run off. So I decided to just follow him. He likes this dirt-hallway behind the Storage Room and Area 42 (My experimentation room). So I watched him for.... awhile. A pig oinking and jumping shouldn't be this entertaining, but hell, it is. Anyways, he walked past me after a bit, completely ignoring me. He stuck his head through the door in to my experimentation room, he seemed to like a big painting of some Martial-Artists on the wall (MADE IT MYSELF. TOTALLY DIDN'T FIND IT ON THE GROUND.) Before he creeped over to the entrance of my mine. He just stood there, as if inspecting it, then he went back to the hallway.... And repeated going back and forth between the main room and the mine entrance.
Why the hell am I doing this?
Day 1, Sunset, Sunsetty, Kinda Cloudy
I looked out of my archery post to see what time it was. It was on the edge of the night, as I looked out I saw the pig was peeking through the door, watching me. I guess when I moved to the side to see if he would come in, he saw what time it was. Believe it or not, he ran in to my mine, and shoved himself in to a 2 by 2 hallway that I had planned on mining for coal in. When I followed him in, I saw him just looking dead ahead. He looked up at me and oinked, looking at my hand for some reason. I remembered the Spiders, the gurgling of zombies....
How scared I was that first night.
I pulled out my stone sword, and the Pig ran over and looked right at it, as if inspecting it. Then he oinked and ran out of the mine. He was at the top of the steps, looking down, as if waiting for me. When I went back to my archery post, he stood at the door jumping up and down and oinking. It made me feel warm on the inside, like when you help somebody or you get a kiss on the cheek or something. It was weird... The last time I had a friend cheering me on like this....
Well, never mind, that wraps up the first day. I stand at my post now, looking at my 2 lines of fortified walls, complete with iron doors and a glass roof over it all. Steve is wandering about in the main room now, I can hear him pacing back and forth. That's his name by the way, Steve. Just like my last pet.
Day 2, Midnight, Dark, Cold, Cloudy
I went out of my archery post a bit to check the time, and just as I did I saw it turn to night. I went back in, securing the door behind me. But when I came back in, Steve had disappeared! I looked down the hallway, but then I heard an oink, and I saw he was in my mine... Again. He kept lingering around the stairs to the 2nd floor of my mine. But, just then I hear another oink coming from above me, and then the sound of walking on grass! I figured that this must be why Steve like the Mine so much, their was another pig on the roof!
MY HYPOTHESIS TURNED OUR HORRIBLY INCORRECT.
He leaped down to the second floor of the mine, passed my 1st pit stop, passed my second, then ran at the stairs leading up to a huge cave system! After a long time of trying to push him up the stairs, I gave up and made a platform for him to get up to the cave. Afterwards, I gave him a few minutes, then he went back tot he entrance stairs. I looked at him, waiting, but then he ACTUALLY shook his head and walk away! I just can't understand this....
Day 2, Early Morning, N/A
He FINALLY goes out of the cave, to the top of the stairs, looks at the way to our home, and then he LEAPS BACK IN TO THE CAVE! I sealed it up before he had a chance to get back in, though. He's really starting to make me mad.... Does he even NOTICE me? I'm jumping up and down telling him to GET UP HERE!
Day 4, Night time, Clear sky
I finally lured that stupid pig out of the cave! But, of COURSE, the first thing I hear when I get back up? A SPIDER. So I ran out to my Fort's exterior, smashed a hole in the roof, and cut the spider down from the bottom! I had to jump to get at him to! Just before the final strike, the sun started to rise and the spider looked at me as if pleading for forgiveness. I cut it's head off.
And guess what else? The outer-most part of my fort is officials home to 4 chickens and a sheep. Basically, Steve turned my place in to a farm. Ugh..... What'll I do? I guess I just have to tough it out. Until then.... That's it for Day 2 and 4.... That pig is lucky he's not in my furnace yet.
Day 5, Morning-Noon, Sunny Sunshine Suntime
I've recently crowned my sheep (the one who's always next to the gate) the Guard. I don't know how, but for some reason he seems to keep the undead away, yet more Spiders have been showing up. Maybe it's an Animal thing. Steve is also hanging around outside now, finally out of my home. He likes the pond with all the flowers near it, and I recently caught him bathing in it. I'm not going to be drinking out of it anytime soon. In fact, I might make a new one. I don't need my water Bacon-Flavored (get yours today!)
Something strange has been happening recently, to. The animals.... Their getting very restless. Also, when I was outside yesterday, I heard the wind whipping up.... something strange going on over the mountains. I climbed up a huge cliff, and on the other side of the mountains was snow. Could it have something to do with what's going on around Home Base? I set up a line of flowers to mark where the snow ends and it goes to grass. I'm going to come back later on, maybe with Steve, to find out if the snow moved on or not.
Oh, and another thing, is it possible for Chickens to start a cult? I don't know, but at night I made a big stone chicken in my Experimentation room (for the lulz), and what do I see when I come back? all the chickens gathered around it, with eggs in front of the statue. It's like their worshiping a Chicken of Destiny or something... A prophet. Also, I found 4 iron right behind the statue I made! Imagine the luck!
Oh, and I know an entry without Steve wouldn't make much sense, but I've been kind of already explained what he's been doing. Swimming, sleeping, running. He seems pretty relaxed, but last night.... When the winds picked up, he ran right in to the very inner fort, and back in to the small hidey-hole that he ran in to earlier on in our adventures. He had the same fear in our eyes, and once again all it took to make him come out was a brandish of the sword. Could this have something to do with that gang of spiders? It's all so strange. I need to lie down.
This is Jesse_JR, signing out for the night.
Latest Update: December, Friday the 4th, 2010- Day 5
Next scheduled update: December, Saturday the 5th or Sunday the 6th, 2010- Day 5 Night/Day 6 Morning
Hey, this looks interesting.
I don't really see much wrong with it, as it's funny and new. I can't wait to see what directions you take this in.
Now get back ta work!
Hey, thanks for the compliment! It feels great to know about peoples opinions on this. I'm 100% going to update this tomorrow, I'll be playing around with the pig again then (Remember, this is all 100% what's happened, just slightly altered to the situation)
I love it! Its nice I hope the pig doesn't "Disapper" (you could make a twist with it) <:biggrin.gif:
xD, nah, no disappearing for Steve. But the back-story involves it :tongue.gif: And besides, remember that this is a DIARY, not just a story, so it's all based off a true story.
There are a few spelling/grammar things you should fix ("their" "there"), and you should choose a POV...that is, in-game/out-of-game, first-person third-person...you switch between all of these at times.
However, your writing skill, style, and premise is all absolutely and totally wonderful. Can't wait to see what's next.
Oh, and your poll is very humorous. I almost voted negatively just for the fun of it.
And one more thing! Perhaps you should either put the commentary in a reliable place, or leave it out of the story and place it elsewhere. It ruined the good flow you'd established in your writing.
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Alright everybody, I'll be updating the story in to Day 2 soon. Thanks a ton for the compliments and suggestions, they really help and keep me motivated.
It's original for sure, but I don't see it getting far.
I really didn't like the writing style, though.
It's like it was written in 4chan;
You can't turn every line into some disability/retardation joke.
For some reason, I feel as if I should disregard your advice completely and listen to the people who enjoyed it. I think you're really over exaggerating it, but it's your opinion I guess. It's not like I can just take all the humor out of it and completely change my writing style to how you see fit.
It's original for sure, but I don't see it getting far.
I really didn't like the writing style, though.
It's like it was written in 4chan;
You can't turn every line into some disability/retardation joke.
For some reason, I feel as if I should disregard your advice completely and listen to the people who enjoyed it. I think you're really over exaggerating it, but it's your opinion I guess. It's not like I can just take all the humor out of it and completely change my writing style to how you see fit.
I know, I'm not going to follow it anyway.
EDIT:
Hold on, did you just say that you're going to disregard anyone who dislikes it, and only listen to the people who do like it? Why do you have the poll in the first place, then?
It's original for sure, but I don't see it getting far.
I really didn't like the writing style, though.
It's like it was written in 4chan;
You can't turn every line into some disability/retardation joke.
For some reason, I feel as if I should disregard your advice completely and listen to the people who enjoyed it. I think you're really over exaggerating it, but it's your opinion I guess. It's not like I can just take all the humor out of it and completely change my writing style to how you see fit.
I know, I'm not going to follow it anyway.
EDIT:
Hold on, did you just say that you're going to disregard anyone who dislikes it, and only listen to the people who do like it? Why do you have the poll in the first place, then?
I'll edit my post and put in [/sarcasm] then. I'm not one of the people who take the internet to seriously, so I don't usually assume somebody will analyze it thoroughly and make their own assumptions through something left relatively incomplete.
Just a tip from someone who's had plenty in his own time.
I'm willing to and ready to, but theirs really no way to express sarcasm on the internet I guess :tongue.gif:. And I'd like more specific advice then just very general things that I can change. Also.... New parts are up. Not as good as the previous entries in my opinion, but it helps me build up to what I'm planning on.
Prolouge/Day 0
Alright, so after awhile of exploring this strange world, I felt like I'd done everything. But one day, on my main save file, their were 3 spiders hanging around the small glass observatory I had in my crafting room, inside my Inner-Fort. But I saw a Pig with them! He was being pushed about by them, right on top of the glass. That is, at least, until they turned their wicked heads over to me....I broke the glass of my observatory and jumped out, challenging all 3 at once. I had sustained quite a bit of damage, and I remember that their was a Pig with the gang of spiders. So I turned to this Pig, and was about to raise my sword and decapitate the poor fellow so I could.... Eat him. And replenish lost limbs.
Anyways, I looked over at him. He looked up, and oinked, as if saying 'Thanks!' But I think he MAY have taken it the wrong way, because he jumped through the crack in my observatory and proceeded to jump on everything inside of it. He had a particular interest in the storage chest, and I had to lure him out by making a small opening in my wall. After successfully luring him out, I decided I'd just sleep on it.
So basically, this is going to be my diary. Everything in here is a true account, as I explore more about the behavior of this pig and what he does, and what changes as time goes by. This is going to be a story for the audience, and a fun adventure for me.
Day 1, Noon, Sunny, No Clouds in sight
So I decided to keep this pig, I had spare cooked ham in my chest anyways. I'll keep this diary to see what happens as our bond develops.
So, today, I tried getting him outside. Either he has ADD or a fear of doors, because every time I'd get him close to the door he'd run off. So I decided to just follow him. He likes this dirt-hallway behind the Storage Room and Area 42 (My experimentation room). So I watched him for.... awhile. A pig oinking and jumping shouldn't be this entertaining, but hell, it is. Anyways, he walked past me after a bit, completely ignoring me. He stuck his head through the door in to my experimentation room, he seemed to like a big painting of some Martial-Artists on the wall (MADE IT MYSELF. TOTALLY DIDN'T FIND IT ON THE GROUND.) Before he creeped over to the entrance of my mine. He just stood there, as if inspecting it, then he went back to the hallway.... And repeated going back and forth between the main room and the mine entrance.
Why the hell am I doing this?
Day 1, Sunset, Sunsetty, Kinda Cloudy
I looked out of my archery post to see what time it was. It was on the edge of the night, as I looked out I saw the pig was peeking through the door, watching me. I guess when I moved to the side to see if he would come in, he saw what time it was. Believe it or not, he ran in to my mine, and shoved himself in to a 2 by 2 hallway that I had planned on mining for coal in. When I followed him in, I saw him just looking dead ahead. He looked up at me and oinked, looking at my hand for some reason. I remembered the Spiders, the gurgling of zombies....
How scared I was that first night.
I pulled out my stone sword, and the Pig ran over and looked right at it, as if inspecting it. Then he oinked and ran out of the mine. He was at the top of the steps, looking down, as if waiting for me. When I went back to my archery post, he stood at the door jumping up and down and oinking. It made me feel warm on the inside, like when you help somebody or you get a kiss on the cheek or something. It was weird... The last time I had a friend cheering me on like this....
Well, never mind, that wraps up the first day. I stand at my post now, looking at my 2 lines of fortified walls, complete with iron doors and a glass roof over it all. Steve is wandering about in the main room now, I can hear him pacing back and forth. That's his name by the way, Steve. Just like my last pet.
Day 2, Midnight, Dark, Cold, Cloudy
I went out of my archery post a bit to check the time, and just as I did I saw it turn to night. I went back in, securing the door behind me. But when I came back in, Steve had disappeared! I looked down the hallway, but then I heard an oink, and I saw he was in my mine... Again. He kept lingering around the stairs to the 2nd floor of my mine. But, just then I hear another oink coming from above me, and then the sound of walking on grass! I figured that this must be why Steve like the Mine so much, their was another pig on the roof!
MY HYPOTHESIS TURNED OUR HORRIBLY INCORRECT.
He leaped down to the second floor of the mine, passed my 1st pit stop, passed my second, then ran at the stairs leading up to a huge cave system! After a long time of trying to push him up the stairs, I gave up and made a platform for him to get up to the cave. Afterwards, I gave him a few minutes, then he went back tot he entrance stairs. I looked at him, waiting, but then he ACTUALLY shook his head and walk away! I just can't understand this....
Day 2, Early Morning, N/A
He FINALLY goes out of the cave, to the top of the stairs, looks at the way to our home, and then he LEAPS BACK IN TO THE CAVE! I sealed it up before he had a chance to get back in, though. He's really starting to make me mad.... Does he even NOTICE me? I'm jumping up and down telling him to GET UP HERE!
Day 4, Night time, Clear sky
I finally lured that stupid pig out of the cave! But, of COURSE, the first thing I hear when I get back up? A SPIDER. So I ran out to my Fort's exterior, smashed a hole in the roof, and cut the spider down from the bottom! I had to jump to get at him to! Just before the final strike, the sun started to rise and the spider looked at me as if pleading for forgiveness. I cut it's head off.
And guess what else? The outer-most part of my fort is officials home to 4 chickens and a sheep. Basically, Steve turned my place in to a farm. Ugh..... What'll I do? I guess I just have to tough it out. Until then.... That's it for Day 2 and 4.... That pig is lucky he's not in my furnace yet.
Day 5, Morning-Noon, Sunny Sunshine Suntime
I've recently crowned my sheep (the one who's always next to the gate) the Guard. I don't know how, but for some reason he seems to keep the undead away, yet more Spiders have been showing up. Maybe it's an Animal thing. Steve is also hanging around outside now, finally out of my home. He likes the pond with all the flowers near it, and I recently caught him bathing in it. I'm not going to be drinking out of it anytime soon. In fact, I might make a new one. I don't need my water Bacon-Flavored (get yours today!)
Something strange has been happening recently, to. The animals.... Their getting very restless. Also, when I was outside yesterday, I heard the wind whipping up.... something strange going on over the mountains. I climbed up a huge cliff, and on the other side of the mountains was snow. Could it have something to do with what's going on around Home Base? I set up a line of flowers to mark where the snow ends and it goes to grass. I'm going to come back later on, maybe with Steve, to find out if the snow moved on or not.
Oh, and another thing, is it possible for Chickens to start a cult? I don't know, but at night I made a big stone chicken in my Experimentation room (for the lulz), and what do I see when I come back? all the chickens gathered around it, with eggs in front of the statue. It's like their worshiping a Chicken of Destiny or something... A prophet. Also, I found 4 iron right behind the statue I made! Imagine the luck!
Oh, and I know an entry without Steve wouldn't make much sense, but I've been kind of already explained what he's been doing. Swimming, sleeping, running. He seems pretty relaxed, but last night.... When the winds picked up, he ran right in to the very inner fort, and back in to the small hidey-hole that he ran in to earlier on in our adventures. He had the same fear in our eyes, and once again all it took to make him come out was a brandish of the sword. Could this have something to do with that gang of spiders? It's all so strange. I need to lie down.
This is Jesse_JR, signing out for the night.
Latest Update: December, Friday the 4th, 2010- Day 5
Next scheduled update: December, Saturday the 5th or Sunday the 6th, 2010- Day 5 Night/Day 6 Morning
I don't really see much wrong with it, as it's funny and new. I can't wait to see what directions you take this in.
Now get back ta work!
Maybe the pig will lead you to some iron?
Sounds gooooooood.....
Btw, I'll put up a poll to get peoples opinions if they can't reply to the topic.
:biggrin.gif:
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/7976/10376729.jpg
xD, nah, no disappearing for Steve. But the back-story involves it :tongue.gif: And besides, remember that this is a DIARY, not just a story, so it's all based off a true story.
There are a few spelling/grammar things you should fix ("their" "there"), and you should choose a POV...that is, in-game/out-of-game, first-person third-person...you switch between all of these at times.
However, your writing skill, style, and premise is all absolutely and totally wonderful. Can't wait to see what's next.
Oh, and your poll is very humorous. I almost voted negatively just for the fun of it.
And one more thing! Perhaps you should either put the commentary in a reliable place, or leave it out of the story and place it elsewhere. It ruined the good flow you'd established in your writing.
I really didn't like the writing style, though.
It's like it was written in 4chan;
You can't turn every line into some disability/retardation joke.
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< Dragon Cave! (aid)
For some reason, I feel as if I should disregard your advice completely and listen to the people who enjoyed it. I think you're really over exaggerating it, but it's your opinion I guess. It's not like I can just take all the humor out of it and completely change my writing style to how you see fit.
I know, I'm not going to follow it anyway.
EDIT:
Hold on, did you just say that you're going to disregard anyone who dislikes it, and only listen to the people who do like it? Why do you have the poll in the first place, then?
< My Steam Account (add me!)
< Dragon Cave! (aid)
I'll edit my post and put in [/sarcasm] then. I'm not one of the people who take the internet to seriously, so I don't usually assume somebody will analyze it thoroughly and make their own assumptions through something left relatively incomplete.
Just a tip from someone who's had plenty in his own time.
I'm willing to and ready to, but theirs really no way to express sarcasm on the internet I guess :tongue.gif:. And I'd like more specific advice then just very general things that I can change. Also.... New parts are up. Not as good as the previous entries in my opinion, but it helps me build up to what I'm planning on.